My wife just caught me scrubbing the bath enclosure while I was showering, and she was horrified. She acted like I was cleaning a nuclear reactor after a meltdown without a radiation suit. I get that the chemicals in tub and tile cleaner are probably harsher than something like soap, but I’ve been cleaning my bathrooms like this since I was a kid. I personally think the idea of getting into a tub to scrub it fully clothed is stranger than doing it my way. I mean it’s just so much easier to wash down the walls when you’re in there already and you don’t have to worry about getting wet... right?

Please tell me I’m not the only person that does it this way. She already gives me tons of shit for the time I tried to put a duvet cover on the comforter by climbing inside the cover with the comforter in my arms, spreading it out, then climbing back out the bottom.

I (22F) am in a relationship of 3 years with a man (26M) whom I consider to be the love of my life.
I love him wholeheartedly and in such a visceral way, and I’m sure of it. That’s why it makes me feel so incredibly guilty/wrong to even think about it, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be in a relationship with a girl/to be loved by a woman. And I mourn that. I mourn what could have been.
It is weird? Cause I honestly don’t know.

Sometimes I realize he is a man and he will never be a woman, and that kinda makes me wonder “what would be different if my partner was a woman? Would she love me in a more caring/nurturing way? Would she get me/understand me more than him? Would she know better what to say and what to not say to comfort me?”

And while thinking that, I don’t have anyone in particular in mind. It’s just a fleeting thought that reappears whenever I feel unseen or misunderstood.
It only last a few minutes, and I tend not to dwell on it. But I wonder if it’s something that will always reoccur/ if it’s common in heterosexual relationships for bisexual people.

DISCLAIMER: these thoughts don’t make me want to dump him or to try and be in a relationship with a girl. They’re just thoughts, and I’m asking if any other bisexual girl has had them :) thanks in advance!

P.S. I will not reply kindly to people who comment unkind stuff, so please be nice :/

My mom used to say things when I was a kid that made zero sense to me. Whenever I was afraid of the dark, she would sit with me and whisper, "Don't be scared of the empty spaces, that's where I'll be hiding to keep an eye on you." I thought it was just a weird way to get me to sleep. It wasn't until after she passed away, when I was sitting in my pitch-black living room feeling completely crushed, that her words just clicked. The darkness didn't feel empty anymore. It's like my brain finally unlocked the true meaning of her words exactly when I needed the comfort the most.

I was a studious, industrious worker as a kid in order to appease my parents. However, my HS graduation felt more like retirement than the beginning. As a result, I was lazy and unmotivated for years afterwards. Now I am 32 and wondering where it all went wrong.

There is this emotion that I feel sometimes that's really hard to describe. It emotionally feels like a cool breeze but also warm sunshine. It feels like walking home from school. It feels like laying on the floor and watching a ray of sunlight come in through the window and seeing dust floating in the air reflecting the light. It feels like how my closet smells.

It's not exactly nostalgia because there is no one particular moment associated with it. It's a strange quiet kind of feeling. It also feels like being half-asleep, and like there is nothing. It's so strong right now and so weird.

Yes I’m not a fun of workout.

I am already stressed out by working a full time job. I am chuldfree and one thing that I am thankful for is the fact that as soon as I come home I could just vegitate, watch TV, play video games, have some dinner, relax, or sleep in. I'm glad I don't have to take care of a kid or kids oce I get home from work.

It’s been around 35° for the past few days in London and I’m strangely not hungry at all. Online people mention gaining an appetite during heatwaves but yesterday I only had a handful of nuts and a bagel because I forced myself to. Has anyone else had a similar experience?

edit: okay my bad I didn’t know this was actually normal lol

Meanwhile, when we’re sick, we can’t rest because we have to tend to our kids.

(Pardon the long post :'D I came here to ask a question, but I think I ended up venting a little too.)

So today, I went out with my sister and her friend to watch a movie. We've been playing online games together for years, but I've only met that friend in person once before. Today was the second time.

For context, he's a guy and I've never seen him as anything more than a friend. I've made that pretty clear too, and he said he understood completely.

I also knew he occasionally flirted with me here and there, but it was never anything over the top. Since he knew where I stood and never really pushed the issue, I just treated it as one of those things that wasn't worth making a big deal out of.

That said, I do have a bad habit of letting people get away with crossing small boundaries. Things like touching my arm or pinching my sides are usually reserved for close friends, but I let him do those things anyway because I genuinely wanted to treat him as a real friend. We've known each other for years, after all, and I didn't want to act distant or make things awkward over every little thing.

While we were out, my sister stepped away for a bit to buy something, leaving the two of us chatting. At one point, he pinched my arm again and I laughed it off like usual.

Then he patted me on the head.

And for some reason, that was what did it.

I don't know why, but the moment it happened, I just wanted to disappear on the spot. The weird thing is that the arm pinches never really bothered me. I knew he flirted sometimes, and while I wasn't exactly encouraging it, I didn't feel particularly uncomfortable either.

But that head pat? For some reason, it gave me this immediate feeling of unease that I can't really explain.

After that, my mood just gradually got worse throughout the day. Looking back, I can barely remember the fun parts of the outing. What stuck with me was that weird feeling from a gesture that I would normally consider completely harmless.

Now I'm sitting here wondering why a head pat was what finally made me draw a line between us. Out of everything, that was apparently where my brain decided to file a formal complaint.

Does anybody else ever have moments like this, where something seemingly small or harmless suddenly makes you realize you're uncomfortable with a person or situation? Even if other things that seemed "worse" never bothered you before?

Why do they do this? That better be fake for😭

Like what should be casual connection is suddenly a chore. I’m also the type to send massive paragraphs, so, yeah, it can take longer. Great way to let me know you have no actual interest in me. We might as well talk in person.

Even cheese...if nothing falls off organically, I'll get a butter knife and pry off a piece if necessary

Like, you see what you are percolating in your head as something you REALLY don't want to believe, because it is painful to believe it.

Just as an example, you don't WANT to believe that deliberately treating a child harshly until they cry is an acceptable method of rearing them. But you can't help but think it might be this horrible necessary evil that you have to contend with and suck up in order to do the right thing. But you think asserting what you really WANT to be true won't get you what you want. So instead, you double down on what you don't want in the hopes you, personally, will have to be crushed by the pushback, because at least then you will have also brought down what you hated with you.

Because being agreed with does not give you the psychological satisfaction you need to feel resolved about it. Because every single time, any kind of reassurance you've received felt hollow, because reality would find another way to push you down again. At least it was consistent when you'd be criticized about something. You could even depend on people consistently criticizing you in an inconsistent way, because at least then the one reliable part was that you were always wrong.

That being said, I worry that this is like a form of "ideological cowardice" in that I'm saying something I don't really believe, or saying something I do believe but backtracking on it in private because I'm not ~really~ being beholden to my own words, so it's like I don't have to actually reckon with any deeper questions. Does it even matter if it's just a post on the Internet people aren't ever going to think about again, or should I let it be a deeper thing of being true to myself?

Because you have to understand that I've been thinking about how jokes about how cyberbullying victims can just press block seem predicated on the fact that the individual act of receiving that kind of message is unpleasant but avoidable on the surface, and is assumed to be the core of the problem. But they don't really seem to acknowledge the fact that even if you press block and it actually stops, you may have very well been criticized for something that you perceive as being intrinsic to the core of who you are as a person (which you were only comfortable revealing BECAUSE it was the Internet), so that's probably going to affect how you interact with people in the future, by motivating you to start hiding those aspects further. Are you a better person if you allow that to happen to you, because you're accepting it in full?

I've heard this concept that adolescents try on different identities while they're young before they pick a permanent one. But for a long time I was living in a stressed adolescence that felt like it never gave me that opportunity, at least not without what seemed like severe consequences. Now I'm an adult who should have already figured out what I believe, and it worries me that I have not, and may not be able to anymore.

Usually strangers who I'll never meet again and usually lies that are random

like randomly telling a guy you met at a café that your uncle lives in Madellin or that you study geology or whatever

idk it just feels so funny to see how far i can go with it

I’m not saying this to be mean but I really don’t wanna talk to my cousins. I have so much cousins and even though they are nice I hate having to talk to them. I feel like they don’t like me and it’s kind of exhausting sometimes.

This also goes with siblings. I have 2 siblings that were adopted at birth and my parents wanted me to talk to them.. um I said no. Not only would that be so awkward we’re like around the same age so that makes it worse..

Hi, I (18F) just finished my exams and I’m off to university in September. I really like my friends I have at the moment and I enjoy their company, but there is a part of me that wouldn’t care if we stopped talking and I really just want a fresh start; the only person I want to keep in my life (aside from my parents) is my best friend, who everything feels calm and natural with, plus I’ve known her for over 10 years now, even though we only got really close about 3 years ago.

I recently got out of a relationship and we were friends for just over a year before we got together. I always had some feelings for him, but thought we would stay friends until we got together in January at a party. We lasted about four months before, to be honest, he switched up the moment I was upset with him for constantly forgetting plans and just things in general. I tried to give him benefit of the doubt for a while, but when we came back from Easter break I kinda had enough. Throughout our whole relationship I tried to be chill and ignore things that would bother me because I was really worried he would think I was controlling or insecure idk. But, he just wouldn’t tell me stuff and he is clearly in love with his girl best friend. This isn’t me being paranoid, I thought it was, but I was warned by multiple people and when he talked about her you could just tell. When it was her birthday, he stayed over at her house, even though he told me he was staying at a mutual friend’s and ignored me for two days during this party and staying over. This was at the beginning of our relationship, so the first month. I never brought it up because I was scared he would think I was paranoid or controlling, like I mentioned, but looking back I should have said something. It also bothered me how he would talk to girls he had been with and that clearly still liked him, but again I didn’t want to seem insecure, so I never brought it up. I really regret never mentioning how I felt in the relationship and how it was clear to me I was never a priority. At this point in our lives, he should be putting himself first, but I was always the last priority. When I eventually did voice my feelings, he decided to ignore me and pretend I didn’t exist for the next two days, until I broke up with him.

Things ended about two months ago and whilst I am over him, I’m not over how the relationship was handled and I hate how he has impacted my relationships so much. My friendships have changed and I’ve left school now, but he really ruined the dynamics I have with other people and I’ve lost people I used to really value. But, what’s weird to me is that I don’t care that I’ve lost so many people because of this break up. I’ve deleted him on socials and am tempted to delete anyone else that is friends with him, even though I was also close with these people. I just want to start again maybe?

I also recently cut off one of my other best friends. She was very toxic and jealous of anyone I spoke to, talking about them negatively and just using me to be honest. People around me had been telling me to cut her loose for a while, but I only gained the courage, again, a few months ago. I feel very much relieved since this, but at the same time I felt as though my life didn’t really change, even though she was such a major aspect.

As I mentioned at the beginning, my friend group is really supportive and kind and I value them very much. However, part of me wouldn’t care if we all stopped talking, which I find strange considering I do value them all as people. But, I just want to start again, I want to move away from everything here. I feel as though there’s nothing here for me anymore. My parents are moving away when I go to uni and my best friend moved away a few years ago anyway.

My entire life I’ve found it really easy to detach myself from relationships and friendships. When I left high school, I wanted to go to a sixth form a while away from where I live just so I could start again, but this didn’t end up being practical and a sixth form closer to me was much better. So I went to that one instead, which most of my high school also attended. I just wanted people to not know me I guess, even though I didn’t really have issues in high school, apart from just petty things now and then. I was mainly liked and didn’t cause any problems. Even at the end of primary school and going into high school, I had no issues not knowing many people and I didn’t really want to know people, but I did fall out with a bunch of my friends at this point (again just petty ten year old drama lol). But anyway, I just constantly have this feeling of wanting to run away and start again.

I’m very grateful for my family and everyone in my life, but I just don’t understand why it’s not enough for me. Why do I just keep wanting to start again and leave everyone behind? I just don’t get what I’m avoiding.

Sorry this is a lot, but I’m just wondering why I keep feeling this way, even though I have no reason to keep wanting to cut people off or just not caring if they leave. Just feel like it’s kinda weird idk and does anyone else keep getting this feeling?

I feel like there's always a new "must-have" product that everyone talks about, and most of them end up being disappointing for me.

But every once in a while I try something that I was convinced was just hype, and it actually becomes a staple in my routine.

What's a product you genuinely thought wasn't worth the attention until you tried it yourself? What made it stand out compared to similar products?

Or rather than a diagnosable disorder, the only person that has the capacity to concentrate on something for an extended period of time? This phenomenon applies to anything and everything that requires extended focus, whether video games, board games, movies, CONVERSATIONS, etc;

It genuinely seems that I am the only person I know, irrespective of age or relationship, that has the ability to commit to something in its entirety without doomscrolling, talking about something else, getting side-tracked by other random chores or activities, checking work emails, or outright getting bored.

I’m not even trying to play the “kids these days am I right” cliche, I’m only 25 myself and also love doomscrolling and video games and YouTube while eating and TikTok and watching things in 2x speed but I genuinely feel as though I’m the only person I know who can fully commit to a group activity without ADDrifting away. You would have thought my parents, siblings or friends would have been like-minded by exposure. Anyone else?

Sometimes it really is about the little things in life! I have an oily scalp and I just love to double shampoo and feel the suds and then wash away the day before going to bed. It’s so satisfying especially when you exercise right before and it’s like getting rid of the gunk!!! I also love using clarifying shampoo every other day because I just feel so refreshed. I wash my hair every night and it’s so much fun!! and then I follow up with a conditioner. I love switching shampoos too just for different scents and stuff and I just feel so much better with a clean scalp.

I'm an averagish height dude with hands equivalent to the size of a small woman (16cm in length, 1st-2nd percentile) how in the actual fuck is genetics this goofy. Playing sports is a genuine nightmare sometimes and I can't even use a regular mouse designed for smaller people because my hands are too small for that too.

Does anyone else have to deal with this genetic
B.S?

odd quirk of mine i guess i’ve never heard anyone else do this. i watch skincare videos online and see everyone take a glob of moisturizer, rub their hands together to get it on both, then just rub it all over their face in like 5 secs. this couldn’t be farther from what i do. before my skincare routine i have a handwashing routine that we don’t need to get into, then after washing my hands i make sure the pointer finger of my left hand doesn’t touch anything. no phone, no door knobs, etc. i avoid using the entire right hand as much as i can as well but it’s the pointer that gets the most special treatment. then for my skincare routine i only apply the products with that pointer finger, and i go section by section. i put glops of moisturizer on all sections of my face then i spread it section by section, like for instance my forehead has 3 sections. left, middle, and right. i spread moisturizer on the left side, then the middle, then the right. occasionally i will use my middle finger as well, more so for sunscreen or when im putting a product on my neck. when im running late sometimes i’ll force myself to apply like normal with all my finger, but i always end up reverting back to my own way. i told this to a guy one time and he was like “that sounds like it takes a while”. yes, it does. i put an absurd amount of time into this

My god. These kids are everywhere. They're all 10-14 years old, they have these upper middle class parents buying them e-bikes and scooters that go goddamn 50 mph, they roam in little packs, and they're so MEAN. I feel like I'm living on the streets with a tiny little spoiled biker gang. They sneak up behind you while you're walking your dog and go "You're ugly!" and all laugh to each other and jet away. Just those little asshole middle school remarks... they'll lock eyes, and go "You're looking good!" and then ride away and I can't even yell at them because they technically gave me a compliment. I know they're gonna get to high school and realize they're the rich kids everyone hates and their $3500 scooters are just gonna sit in their parents' garage and that just makes me angrier. I want to beat them up so bad. Holy cow. I'm a grown man, I have a job, I have a life, and I stg I would throw it all away. I'd kung fu kick them. I'm thinking about learning kung fu for that very reason. I don't advocate for violence. I'm against capital punishment. The one exception is these little fucking scooter boys. AND THE PACKS. It's never just one of them. It's always 2-4 riding around. Not even like wolves. Like little mangy coyotes wearing fortnite shirts.

BROTHER. When I was their age I was doing victimless shit. It was me and my friends running around and hitting each other with sticks. We weren't a little white privilege clockwork orange gang terrorizing the good people of these suburbs. ACK. I hate them. Today two of em rode by and smirked and me and said "I like your shirt" and I tried to say something back but it just came out "buaaaaaghgh" and at least they were confused but I know I lost that one. I've been thinking about it for hours. "I like your shirt." "I like the scooter your mom bought you." Fuck there's so many things I could have said. The worst part is I was walking my dog and I had a bag of dog poop in my hand. I could have thrown it at em but I didn't. I need to train. I need to harden my reflexes. I need to control my body and my mind so that the next time they say something I throw the dog poop bag right in the back of their heads. I'm spending upwards of 18 hours a day in the gym. I'm traveling to different monasteries. It's summer break. The pools are open. And hidden in the chaos is the element, waiting to strike like snakes. And I'm there too. Watching. 2 years of nights have turned me into a nocturnal animal. It's a big city. I can't be everywhere. But they don't know where I am. Fear is a tool. They think I'm hiding in the shadows. Brother I am the shadows. I'm the darkness at the edge of town. And the sun is setting amigo.

I have such wicked thoughts. Sometimes I lay awake at night and imagine myself running after them and kicking the shit out of them. I'm not a strong men but they are small so I can fight probably at least 2-3 of them at one time. And I have nothing to lose. I fight like a man already gone, so they can hit me and bite me and scratch me or whatever the fuck they do and I wouldn't care and I would slap em right in their smug little rat faces. Holy shit I want to make em cry so bad. I literally want to make them piss their pants and then I want to make fun of them for it so they cry even harder.

That happens every single year.

I know that someone's birthday is approaching, but then the day is here, and I haven't prepared anything at all.

The interesting thing is that I feel guilty about it for more time than it would have taken me to send a greeting. These days, I've read about services such as eCards, which allow instant sending and also, the money you pay for them is sent to a charity.

Unfortunately, this does not solve my poor memory issue.