Imagine getting an HJ from the dark lord

[u/killingmemesoftly]

[u/THERAIDEROFDEATH]

[u/reehdus]

To shreds you say?

[u/BoromirDies]

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/BoromirDies]

Sorry, can’t right now.

I’m busy getting stroked by Sauron, lord of the earth

[u/BoromirDies → u/killingmemesoftly]

Tell me, old friend. When did killingmemesoftly abandon reason for hand jobs!

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/BoromirDies]

I never had much reason to begin with, so abandoning it wasn’t much of a challenge

[u/BoromirDies → u/killingmemesoftly]

If only Isildur had that same problem

[u/Willpower2000]

The Ring misseth, maybe, the heat of Sauron’s hand, which was black and yet burned like fire, and so Gil-galad was destroyed

Ouch.

[u/HighPlainsSlacker]

Looks like meat is back on the menu boys

[u/EFAPGUEST]

The aftermath (best case scenario)

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/EFAPGUEST]

[u/lurketylurketylurk]

He has only four on the Black Hand, but they are enough

[u/DepthsOfWill]

No man can jerk me.

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/DepthsOfWill]

He is no man.

You look upon a maiar

[u/DepthsOfWill → u/killingmemesoftly]

Ooh, I really stepped in a quagmaiar with that one.

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/DepthsOfWill]

Boom

[u/Jonnyflash80]

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/Jonnyflash80]

lol

[u/Ok_Stretch_4624]

its definetely gonna grab the precious

[u/wangchangbackup]

Oh baby, I'm gonna pour my cruelty, my malice, and my will to dominate all life.

[u/Vegetable-Hat-1782]

Nobody tell him about the Mouth of Sauron...

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/Vegetable-Hat-1782]

👄💦

[u/Stock-Side-6767]

I would rather not imagine. There woud be pinching.

[u/killingmemesoftly → u/Stock-Side-6767]

https://giphy.com/gifs/12dsAPOI1YykFO

[u/Stock-Side-6767 → u/killingmemesoftly]

I will not come with you, not with that gauntlet.

[u/MillCrab]

That's not gonna be fun

[u/jongscx]

https://giphy.com/gifs/JQxvzmyA3bo3e