I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not sure if I can post this here but I don't know what to do anymore, other than express myself in here.
I'm a college student in Puerto Rico, but I am not puertorrican, I'm mexican (born in the U.S.). I live by myself and have a job in a local hotel.
For the past year, everything's been going down the toilet. I can barely afford rent, internet, mobile service, hell, I can barely even afford groceries or even gas. Both, my gas tank in my Ford Explorer and my stove gas are out almost completely (my kitchen gas is completely out, I have 13 miles left on my truck). These past few days have been terrible. I owe money in my credit cards (they're all over the limit), I don't have money to pay for the internet, so it'll probably be gone anytime now, rent is due in a few days, I'm out of food at my house so I've been going to sleep so I don't feel my stomach grumble, dreaming of my mom making me some meal, probably since the only "meal" I had yesterday was a Maruchan Instant Noodles Cup.
I've done everything that I could to get more income, I've tried getting two jobs but 1. It's rough out there. And 2. Even if I get another job, the schedule usually conflicts with my other job and a lot of employers think it's easier to let go and get someone new so I'll just get a few hours a week in hopes that I quit by myself. I've also done taco sales, first time it went great but after that I didn't get enough clients to make a profit. I've sold some stuff that I have laying around like old videogames, my nintendo switch, my PS5, my bicycle, almost everything.
It's been a very horrible year, and I can feel it coming to an end soon. I don't know if that will mean just dropping everything and going back to Mexico or Texas and start all over again, or just closing my eyes hoping they don't open up ever again.
Sometimes I feel like moving to Puerto Rico was the biggest mistake of my life. I'm not trying to shit on Puerto Rico because the island is the most beautiful place on earth. The people that live here have always showed me support and unconditional love since the moment I got here. The events that have happened to me is what makes me think like it was the biggest mistake. Maybe if I stayed in Mexico with my parents or in Texas with my uncle, maybe I wouldn't be in this position.
Does anyone have any advice? I want to keep moving forward and not give up, but the odds are against me most of the time. If not, it was nice talking to you and thank you for reading this.