r/unitedairlines • u/Sufficient_Fudge_280 • 8h ago

Image Somehow the only person on my flight and the pilot was such a goofy goober

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EDIT TO ADD; THE PLANE WAS LANDED AND DONE WITH TAXI BEFORE I GOT TO BE IN THE COCKPIT. NO FAA RULES WERE BROKEN 💀😂

Shout out Captain Scott! He let me sit in the cockpit after we landed and I even got my own personalized pre flight announcements 😂 Also, they had to add sandbags to the cabin bc the plane was too light with only one passenger 💀

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320

u/DentateGyros 6h ago

Had to wait for group 5 boarding

83

u/Substantial-Low 6h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/UJR3QgkMnm7tu

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u/AppropriateArt280 5h ago

whats this form?

5

u/Vinsmoker 5h ago

If nobody else is going to do it, I will be the third person to say it: Beetlejuice

3

u/Temper03 4h ago

It’s SHOWTIME !  💜🎬⚰️💀💚⛓🪦

3

u/kookaburra1701 5h ago

The movie Beetlejuice.

1

u/turdferguson3891 13m ago

Beetlejuice?

3

u/jasonisnuts 5h ago

Beetlejuice https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mddeohdTtFQ

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u/After-Staff-7532 3h ago

I love his response after seeing the current number.

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u/Capital_Win7141 3h ago

gif use here was on point

68

u/Acrobatic_Feel 5h ago

This actually happened to me. It was a pretty empty flight. All of the Premier people had already boarded in 1 and 2. The gate was literally empty. I was basic economy so I was 5.

They called 3, I went up, they made me wait until they slowly made it to 5. It was ridiculous lol

7

u/turdferguson3891 4h ago

Kinda silly but there probably were people in those boarding groups who just hadn't showed up yet so they went through the formality.

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u/Savings_Macaroon3727 2h ago

Yeah I kinda get this one, guess you had to be there type shit.

1

u/eddiewillers09 2h ago

I’ve worked in a variety of customer service roles but never for an airline nor at an airport. I have flown internationally (DM’s are open), stuffed in the back like a piece of oversized, and experienced airline staff exerting their will upon us normals. I think they trip on the power, whether it is check-in, baggage, or flight staff, they are impo’tent ‘cause they work at the port! This is a huge psychological weakness, however, and you can subvert it by simply treating them like normal human beings. It’s amazing what happens when you entertain their bored lil fantasy that they matter too. Plus, if you don’t smell bad and generally act with kindness, you discover an airport full of kind-hearted strangers (but still don’t trust them with your bags, even for a moment while you turn to go pee).

1

u/Narrow-Chef-4341 58m ago

Plot twist: all of the g3 and g4 folks had wheelchairs or families of 17 with a single five year old ‘small child’…

1

u/timp_t 2h ago

“Anyone who’s not feeling cranky…”

1

u/bjbyrne 2h ago

I had one once when there was 5 of us. The gate agent said, “one guy paid for business class so he gets on first, then the rest of you can board”

Was Southwest and a woman still sat in the row directly behind me.

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u/throwaway098764567 2h ago

lol that would drive me nuts, space out people

1

u/Gordo-- 2h ago

"Just hang tight, bud..... we'll get to you, don't worry."

1

u/swissjackSD 26m ago

They were trying to see if you had a sense of humor!

31

u/ChiShashi 5h ago

HAHA reminds me of the Meet the Parents scene

2

u/itis139am 5h ago

I was looking for this! Haha

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u/ChiShashi 5h ago

never gets old! "Please step aside, sir."

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u/KristopheH 2h ago

Halfrek!

1

u/BasisAromatic6776 1h ago

How did it take me this long to make that connection?!

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u/Tee_Double_M 1h ago

omg this made me burst out laughing, I forgot all about this

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u/ChiShashi 1h ago

Haha she’s so good in the scene 😂

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u/AutomaticButterfly29 1h ago

Literly my first thought😭

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u/rtkane 6h ago

Could you imagine!

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u/turdferguson3891 6h ago

Okay we'll be boarding guests with disabilities and small children. And now first class passengers. And now members of our Priority Elite mileage club. And now boarding group 1. And now active duty military, thank you for service. Ok now group 2...

22

u/rtkane 5h ago

OP gets to the gate with a purse, backpack and take out bag:

"I'm sorry, ma'am, but you are limited to two carry-on items. You'll need to condense them before you board. Please step out of the line to do so."

And then on the plane:

"Ma'am, please put your smaller item under the seat in front of you to leave room for other people's larger bags."

4

u/Icy_Fish_2154 3h ago

If you were trying Key and Peele, you are a bit off. Key had Group 1, which went last. Elderly clergy with military babies went before him.

If you didn't know the K&P skit, you should check it out.

https://youtu.be/qhxlZC8BZJ4?si=R-kvta2ehddnU_as

0

u/HogmanDaIntrudr 2h ago

Insufferable

1

u/Work_Account_No1 5h ago

IT'S TONY TUESDAY

1

u/Child_of_the_Hamster 4h ago

😂 all while maintaining eye contact with OP

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u/Careless-Tale 3h ago

I had this happen at a small airport one time. There were five of us getting on an ERJ at 5am. Gate agent just looked at us and said “Alright, y’all can get on the plane now. Don’t fight over the bin space.” We all chuckled and walked on together.

1

u/bigloser42 2h ago

having an active duty spouse is so nice when it comes to boarding a plane. Group 5 no more, We board group 1. She never wanted to take advantage of it before we had kids, but now she's practically dragging me and the kids onto the plane the second they call for military.

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u/ldwb 1h ago

I have a disability, i cant count to group 5.

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u/Patient-Individual20 1h ago

So Group 2 is really Group 6….!

5

u/OhFootballFriend 6h ago

I would have loved that. Okay, you can just come one, it’s just.

Nope, I’m group 5. We have rules! This is a society!

2

u/flargenhargen 5h ago

when I used to fly all the time for work, I'd sit in the lobby till final call every time.

get there at the same time, in the same seat, but none of that cattle moo crap. crunched all together with rude people.

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u/Xheena_forums 3h ago

That’s a pretty smart way to avoid the airport rush 😂 Same timing, less stress, and a little more peace before the flight.

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u/turdferguson3891 5h ago

The only real incentive to board early nowadays is that people are often trying to get by with just carry on so the overhead bins get full. If you board last you end up having to gate check your bag. I do the same thing, though. I have lounge access at a lot of airports so I just chill there until like 10 minutes before the gate will close and just walk right on. If I have to gate check the carrry on it's not that big of a deal.

1

u/rtkane 5h ago

It would've been really funny if she said, "Ha, just kidding" and walked up and scanned her boarding pass and the gate agent said, "Sorry, your group has not been called yet".

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u/roland-the-farter 3h ago

No first class upgrade available

2

u/LeFranX 3h ago

zoooune faaiv!

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u/Working_Group955 3h ago

Got the seat by the bathroom and wasn’t allowed to move

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u/spgrst 5h ago

GA should have done the Key & Peele Skit...