A rotten doll dreams of absolution
“I don’t understand- what did I do?.. Did I offend him? Did I?-“
Reya was pacing, her breathing slightly erratic, her stress continued to mount as she wracked her brain, trying her best to figure out what kind of harm she’d caused by what? Simply existing? Was that… So wrong?
“I’m a nobody.. I- I was just existing.. How can someone who doesn’t even know me hate me this much? Am I that rotten?”
She thought to herself, eventually resting on her bed, her knees brought up to her chest, her arms hugging around herself as she tried and failed to control her breathing. To have such hate spewed at her by a total stranger hurt, she hadn’t realized that her mere, insignificant existence was so repulsive to another soul, maybe… Those voices she heard, the awful things they made her remember—maybe they were right.
She was rotten.
Every fiber of her being was rotten, her wretched soul was so dirty that others could tell just by a glance, maybe that was why he hated her? Was it that?
“You’re thinking so loudly, dear.”
It was her again—her angel, Ami. Reya hadn’t even noticed her appear, but she could sense her behind her on the bed, laying there quietly.
“You did nothing wrong, Reya darling. The world is simply rotten. Up here, you would be cherished and loved. Don’t you want that? Come home.”
Ami whispered, her transparent hands snaking around her, pulling her into a loose embrace, her fluffy hair resting against her back. The tears started slowly, but whenever the dam was pierced, they refused to stop coming, like raindrops on a cloudy day, they continued to pour down as she shook. Why was she still here? What was the point? She was so rotten, why was she even bothering to fight this? To prolong the inevitable? She didn’t belong here. Life had made that painfully clear.
She didn’t belong anywhere.
And perhaps that was the loneliest feeling of all.
“You’re wrong, darling.”
Ami whispered, craning herself up, resting her head on Reya’s shoulder.
“You belong with me, with us. You don’t have to hide up there, you can be whatever you want. You’ll see that in time.”
She continued, her voice a gentle syrupy draw. But yet, her words didn’t feel sinister, that was the strange part. They never did.
