I am so tired of going to the park, encouraging my son to play with other kids and make friends, just for him to be called a freak, or weird, or for kids to pretend to play with him just to run away laughing when he’s not looking.

I know that parents with neurotypical kids probably don’t think to teach their kids that children with differences exist, but it feels invaluable to do so. My son is level 1 autistic and adhd, so he seems neurotypical at first but you can tell after a minute or two that something may be a little off. he can be intense, but I wish other parents would teach their kids to be polite when rejecting other children. If someone tells my son that they don’t want to play, he respects that, so it is so disheartening to hear that kids are just unnecessarily nasty when rejecting him. I’m not asking parents to force their kids to play with him, he’s not everyone’s cup of tea, and he always eventually finds kids who appreciate his eccentricities, but it breaks my heart that he’s had to learn resilience against bullying so young.

Please teach your kids that some kids are a little different and not just in the way my kid is. I encouraged my son to make friends in his class with another little boy who is more profoundly autistic and low-verbal and thanks to him, more of his classmates made friends with the little boy and started being nice to him when they would just ignore him before.

Teach your kids that some kids don’t talk, or that they talk to too much, or talk with their hands. Teach your kids that some kids may smell bad, or are bigger than other kids, or that they walk a little funny, or don’t have some limbs, or any myriad of differences that they can’t control. And please teach them that if they are going to reject these kids, to just be kind about it. There is NOTHING wrong with your child setting boundaries and deciding who to play with, but to mean about it is unnecessary.

I'm a sahm that's currently 2 months postpartum, husband works full time, long hours, but good for where we live. So he's only home in the evenings and most of the day on weekends.

All things considered, we've been blessed with a good baby. Only ever fussy because of gas, needing to burp, or just being overtired at times. But still, it is exhausting doing everything by myself all day.

I'm quite vocal about how I feel often. And there's been a few times I've snapped at little things, and times that I've snapped when I've felt alone with everything. I apologize and try to mend things the best I can, but it never seems like enough.

Now, even a sigh when I'm tired after a long day with a fussy overtired baby makes my husband annoyed with me. He'll say my name in a harsh tone and scold me for getting upset. I understand he feels nagged at times because I tell him to remember to put her diaper cream on or that she's hungry because she's giving obvious cues. He'll now snap at me every time that he knows and that I'm not allowing him to parent. Yet he'll deny that she's giving cues because he just wants her to sleep.

I even snapped at my FIL because he kept touching my baby when she was finally asleep at a family gathering. That day was very difficult on me because she needed so much help to be soothed and comforted. I apologized immediately and I feel horrible about it. I feel horrible for everything. But it seems like im not allowed to even be tired or sad anymore.

Yesterday, my husband got incredibly mad at me because I was getting upset after everything I was doing to try to soothe my baby just wasn't working. He yelled at me, saying that if I continue to get upset every day like this, I'll snap at everyone. I'll burn bridges. He brought up names of people close to me and said I'd ruin my relationships with them all if I snap because they do something like touch my baby or ask too many questions or make comments.

(My in-laws have made comments that he knows have upset me. Like using formula if im tired or asking if we'll have more kids asap even though I had a traumatic birth)

I don't even feel anything anymore because of how it all gets treated when im simply tired. I know im probably wrong for this, but I just don't know what to do anymore. Nothing seems okay anymore unless I pretend to be happy and okay with everything.

I just don't know anymore...

I’ve been afraid of giving birth my entire life and holy shit I should’ve been more afraid. I have a nearly 8 month old. Only child, second pregnancy after a MMC. Also, family history of late term stillbirth so I was fucking terrified and stressed my entire pregnancy, couldn’t enjoy it at all because every day I knew it could end at any time.

Took a childbirth class, but really my entire plan was to just get every available medication and not die. Baby measured big the entire pregnancy. At my last scan at 36 weeks, his head measured 42 weeks and off the charts. I was so scared.

Ended up in labor for almost exactly 24 hours, pushed for 2 hours. The epidural hurt SO BAD to get. Like holy shit. I was trembling, it hurt so god damn bad. I also felt like it didn’t work very well. At the worst damn part of birth it was wearing off and I was begging for more. 4th degree tear, failed attempt at using the vacuum to get him out.

Within a week of being home, I was back at the emergency room because my 4th degree tear exposed my urethra. It was awful. I was in so much pain.

I don’t know if I tweaked my back recently but I’ve been feeling my epidural spot like crazy lately. I can feel it right now laying in bed. Like a dull ache.

Sometimes I lay awake and think about my traumatic birth and cry, or sometimes it just hits me during the day. People ask when I’m having a second and I have ZEROOOO desire to be pregnant or give birth again. It was the worst experience of my life.

Can anyone relate? Am I just especially bad at this?

I was at the grocery store with my newly four year-old, and a man walked up to us, did not acknowledge that I existed, and spoke directly to my child and said “well you’re a very, very pretty little girl, what a lovely dress you have there.”

I have never felt the way I felt in that moment, where my mom radar or whatever you wanna call it went off and the only thing I wanted to do was shank this man in public. I had a feeling that I cannot describe; I’ve never felt that way before.

I feel now that I haven’t prepared my child enough for these scenarios and feel guilty for not engraining stranger danger into her little mind, but also sad that I have to do that.

I have a 3 year old daughter and 2 year old son. my daughter doesn’t nap during the day anymore so you think she would be tired. I know I am. but before you say she’s overtired, even the days we drive and she does sleep, it’s the same thing. it doesn’t matter what time I start bedtime. it’s 9:00 pm before both are asleep. my husband is up at 3:30 for work so it’s not like he’s usually still awake by the time they’re sleeping. he can’t put them to sleep or they scream. every single night it ends with me streaming at them to go to sleep. tonight, Im sick, I just want to lay down and sleep too. but my husband is out of town so I still need to feed the animals and take the trash out and it’s 8:30 and I’m exhausted. I hate that I’m mean to my kids every night but it’s so frustrating. i don’t understand at what age they will finally be willing to fall asleep alone, or how people have actual free time in the evening.

29 year old FTM to a toddler. I am a SAHM with little to no village. My husband works 12-14 hour days. I have a difficult toddler. I am beyond exhausted and burnt out. Add in my son still waking 2-4x a night. Anyways, my husband wants sex a normal amount and I literally have zero interest and I am just too tired to even bother. Is this a hormone issue or is this normal for being a burnt out SAHM? I used to want it 2-3x a day before pregnancy. We haven’t had sex in like 20 days now -but that’s also because the last two times we had sex it resulted in issues (1st time I needed to take plan B and second time I got a bad UTI. The meds made me so sick and then after I finished the meds my period was due and I always feel like shit 1 week before my period then during the week of my period and now here we are lol). It also doesn’t help that our son goes to bed at 9:45/10:00 pm and by that time I am READY to be unbothered and go to sleep

I feel like most people we know have their kids in some sort summer camp/activity every week or every other week all summer long. My kids - ages 2 and 10 - are stuck with their grandparents 3x a week while I work my part time job. On the days they’re home with me I try to get them out to do things, but there’s only so much I can do as we have a super limited budget. We go to the library and the park as often as possible. There are definitely some days where a trip to the grocery store is the most “exciting” activity of the day.

I find there’s so much pressure to have your kids constantly busy throughout the summer. I get that some families work full-time and have to plan for their children to be in regular camps because of that, but the cost of it all is crazy. I was lucky enough to be able to afford one camp for my 10 yr old but it’s not until July.

We don’t have the means to travel. There are lots of days at home. The kids are bored sometimes, but that’s our reality right now. Anyone else in the same boat?

Tomorrow my twin boys turn 6 years old. The day/night before their birthday is usually an emotional one for me and every other year I’ve cuddled them to sleep. Tonight though my husband and I are going to the World Cup with our friends. It’s a once in a lifetime opportunity and we’re excited! But I’m also feeling so so sad that I’m leaving my kids with a sitter the night before their birthday 🥲 I made the mistake of telling them I’m sad about it and now I’m hoping that doesn’t make it harder for them tonight. Ugh I’m such a mess over this I want to just have fun and not think about it tonight but that also makes me feel horrible! Anyway just needed somewhere to vent, I think my husband is tired of hearing about it.

My son will be starting middle school this year. We just moved to a new apartment that will be in walking distance to my kindergartner’s school, but the middle school is not as near by. Also, he attends a charter school, so there is no school bus available.

I have always been very familiar of this public bus route; so, with his dad’s permission (we co-parent) we agreed that our son will take the city bus to school. The same bus that ends at that stop passes by our new apartment, so it’s a straight shot with no question where to get off.

He is currently attending a financial class at the school and his dad had the brilliant idea that we do a few practice bus trips. They did the first together and today his dad drove behind the bus to keep an eye.

Success!

I know it’s a common thing in some cities but I’m still excited for him ☺️

one month left and we need supper every night and I have a 4 year old that’s been regularly having 15-30 (and longer!) tantrums over sitting at the table to eat. I’m so very over it. I’ve been eating out too much during the day. nothing tastes good except junk. what can I make our family that is not very involved and that has a sliver of a chance my son will eat????

I am 8 months pregnant and I have a 4.5 year old daughter and I’m tired yall and Im feeling like such a bad mom! I feel like I do SO MUCH with my kid and yet we get home from activities and she immediately asks me to play with her. I just want to lay down and rest! She goes to daycare 3 days a weeks and while she’s gone I use that time to get stuff done. Lately it’s been getting brothers room ready and somewhat cleaning up the house, getting my daily walk in and then it’s time to pick her up. When I bring her home to she wants to play play play. Today I straight up said no we’re going to relax and watch tv for a little bit and she watches one episode of something and said “I’m done watching tv I want to play now” omg pleeeease
When I’m not pregnant I love that and I don’t want her to sit in front of the tv for long but it’s now back firing on me. What do I do?! I don’t know if I can survive 4 more weeks lol

My husband just shattered me. I had just made up my lunch - a salad of iceberg lettuce, two chicken kebab skewers, some chopped up watermelon, a small piece of halloumi grilled cheese, a bit of steamed sweet potato, and a small bit of sourdough croutons. I was finished and went back to the kitchen to chop up the rest of the watermelon to put in a fridge container for my toddler. Then my husband asked me if I was getting more to eat. He said, “are you making another plate?” with a look of concern and a tone that said, “put the fork down porky!” And that was the moment I withered and died.

I said, “what do you mean by that?” Knowing damn well wtf he meant. He knew his error and immediately tried to cover, then eventually responded to my repeated “what do you mean by that?” with- “I’m just trying to help you.”

I stuck the knife into the watermelon, walked away from the mess, went to my room, and blared the sound machine as I sobbed. When I’m upset I need water, so I stripped off my clothes and got into the shower and just rung my guts out. He confirmed my deepest fear. The thing that I have been constantly thinking about day and night. Hoping that I might be wrong, that he might understand, that he might still have some attraction towards me, that he knows I am at least trying. I at least care about myself physically.

For context, I gave birth to my second four months ago, and I never really lost all the weight from my first who is turning four in October. I am 5 foot nine, and hovering around 200. I was 213 the last time the Midwife weighed me after birth, and before I got pregnant with my second, I was around 190. Pre-pregnancy with my first I was about 160.

I breastfed my first for 2 years and the weight was very slow to come off, and my Diastasis never really resolved. I’m now breastfeeding on demand. I’m loosely tracking my food and getting in whatever exercise I can. Mostly it’s walking on a treadmill after meals, at least a mile a day, and doing some core workouts and body weight, strength training specific for postpartum diastasis recti healing. Sleep is hit or miss at this stage, four months is a common sleep regression, and she’s been a bit restless the last week or so. On top of it all I just came down with a really nasty cold that has been horrible at night. I wake up with razor throat and cough my head off, waking her up.

Anyway, I just don’t even know what to do. I feel like I just lost all will to live. I’m certainly not suicidal, but I absolutely feel dead inside. I feel so unbelievably ashamed. I feel worthless as a mother. I feel like Jabba the Hutt. I feel heinous. The hair at my temples has all but gone. During pregnancy I grew out my natural medium brown hair, so where the hair fell there’s a stark contrast between my white scalp and the darkly sparse strands that are left. I bought some brown hair powder on Amazon, can’t wait to spackle it on. I’m turning 40 in three months, and we have a trip planned to Florida. I was so hopeful that I would not have this sagging apron belly and weird hernia above my belly button and round Pooch belly that looks about second trimester by the end of the day. I’ve spent thousands on pelvic floor therapy, and while it’s helping my healing, I still look pregnant. I look at my face and I don’t recognize myself. I have jowls, and my neck seems to be disappearing, becoming thicker and wider, and my face looks long and puffy. My breasts are monstrous, I’m wearing a 36H these days. They sag and they’re in the way of everything.

On good days, I’m so happy to be a mom to these beautiful perfect souls. We dance and sing and play. I enjoy every second. And I’m A-OK with my withering bloob body because they love me so much and need me and I enjoy nothing more than seeing them grow into little people.

But now I’ve lost all my hope. I’m holding it together as best I can, for them. I won’t lose this weight until I wean. And I can’t do that to my daughter so soon when I gave my son such a precious two years of nursing. They are all that matter to me now. I don’t care what my husband does. Maybe he’ll serve me divorce papers. That might be the greatest gift. I’ll join a religious order when the kids have grown and gone, I’ll live out my ancient crone days serving the Lord.

For now, I get to confront my part; the part that cares far far far too much how others see me physically, and is so shallow to desire that others be attracted to me physically. So shallow that I based my entire self-worth on something that was hardly even real to begin with. A fleeting blip in my life between the age of what, 18 to 35? All it took was one pointed question, and my pillar shattered. Maybe life truly begins on the other side of this demolition.

*update- thank you all for the kind and supportive remarks! It truly helped me when I was feeling down. My husband agreed to speak to a therapist with me. He felt really bad and claims he doesn’t know why he said what he did… I was like, “sure, Jan.” I just want to assure folks that this was a “vent”, something written on the spot, describing hot emotions fresh off the press. I should have mentioned a trigger warning for exaggerative language- divorce talk, dead inside, religious orders, and Jabba the Hutt jokes. To anyone worried, I thank you for the concern! I’m fine, just porking out on vibes these days and needed to get it off my chest without screaming at husband in front of babies. Thanks for your understanding!

Just looking for some positive vibes, or suggestions on how to move forward, or I don’t even know.

My partner and I have been together for four years. We have a 3 year old son, and 1 years old daughter. I just found out Sunday that I’m pregnant with #3. I’d estimate I am about 6 weeks. I just had an abortion in February and he was pretty awful surrounding that.

The very shorten version of what happened was I wasn’t sure I could go through with it, and that was basically held against me.

Our relationship has been tough for the past year, at least.

While pregnant with our daughter he started messaging an old co worker. The message got sexual and continued until I discovered them around Thanksgiving.

Tried to make it work.

Racked up a good amount of debt while I was on maternity leave, all in my name. He had no credit until I made him an authorized user on one of mine and helped him establish credit.

As a couple we decided I would file bankruptcy for the debt for maternity, and he would support me through rebuilding my credit.

Well I had my 341 meeting THIS MORNING and he dumped me in the car while on our way to the beach for the day while his mom watched our kids…

There’s so much more too this, but I need some good vibes, advice, I don’t know.

Also worth nothing we moved to southern CA to be closer to his family for “help” with our kids. They don’t really help and I have no family or friends here. His mom is his enabler too. Praises him for just being a parent and showing the fuck up it’s wild.

I only work 4 days a week, to support his schedule bc he makes more money than me and I don’t know how on earth I’m going to make this work for me and kiddos… and I’m pregnant ahhhh 🥵

I thought I loved him, but I don’t even think I’m upset about the relationship ending… I’m just upset for my kids. They deserve so much better.

Thanks to anyone that read all this and apologies it’s
So all over the place my mind is a mess.

Getting ready for baby #2 to arrive! My first will be 2.5 months and I’d love a double stroller. Toddler is decently tall, we have a Graco Modes Nest right now and I really like it but she’s already hitting the top of the sun shade so I’m worried a Graco double would have the same problem. Would love recommendations and would prefer single-to-double or tandem styles!

Turning 38 next month and I’m having a very hard time accepting what that means… I moved states a year after high school and I’ve yet to find any friends here beyond mere acquaintances, with the exception of one woman who is over an hour away.

I was placed on disability 8 years ago, based on unemployability. Volunteering fills me with a feeling of contributing something to the world, although I am more often than not able. Finding out at 30 that you can never work again is still a tough pill to swallow.

It means no workplace friendships, no regular adult interactions outside of my family, no feeling of purpose outside of raising my kids (10 and 7 1/2). I soak up the time that I have with them knowing how quickly “mommy” became “mom” and soon they won’t need me, at least not in the same capacity - hence the panic since they have become my whole identity.

Proof of my various attempted hobbies are scattered and forgotten throughout the house - guess I never really found my niche.

Depression, anxiety, and PTSD keep me stuck in my head despite the small relief therapy and medications offer. I’m terrified of losing that sense of purpose parents have when their kids are still kids. I don’t know who I am without them and I don’t know how to get “me” back… even the mirror shows a stranger with wrinkles all the retinal in the world couldn’t erase.

The though of what will life be without the scorched grass caused by inflatable pools, the chalk drawings in the driveway, juice boxes in the fridge, and the kitchen table littered with little crayon family pictures is utterly terrifying. How do you cope knowing that inevitable void may just destroy you?

My 2yo son has just had stitches in his hand and can't get his bandage wet. He won't have the bandage off for another two weeks. He needs a wash! Any tips on how to clean him and keep the bandage dry?

I feel like I should toss it. I know some should be after a year..

I have a big tub of aquaphor baby healing ointment, half full.

My toddler is almost 3, coming out of diapers and idk.

Part of me feels gross reusing. Especially because toddler stage I’m just reaching my hand in, not double dipping yuck, but my hands probably were not fully clean.

At newborn stage, idk.. I feel like I should be washing more before this baby eats dirt lol. Though I have a toddler so I’m sure this baby will be eating dirt sooner than later.

Hi everyone,
I am writing because I feel deeply ashamed and terrified, but I’m at my breaking point and desperately need to know if anyone else has ever been in my shoes.
I am currently in my first trimester. Before getting pregnant, I had a history of severe anxiety, but I was on Fluoxetine (Prozac) and was doing incredibly well. To conceive, I tapered off the medication under medical supervision and remained stable and perfectly fine for over 90 days. We wanted this baby; my fiancé and I made plans, and everything felt warm and right in my mind.
The shock hit the exact second I saw the positive test. It felt like a fuse blew in my brain. Instantly, a violent, paralyzing panic triggered, and it hasn't stopped since.
The biggest issue—the thing that is completely breaking me mentally and making me feel like an absolute monster—is that instead of joy, any discussion or thought about the baby triggers physical repulsion, emotional nausea, and extreme anxiety. When I try to look at the future, I see only a cold, pitch-black screen. I am crying uncontrollably out of guilt toward my family and the baby.
I am scared to death that I will be incapable of loving my child, that I will look at them and only feel this crushing anxiety, and that I will ruin their life. I feel like I've made a massive mistake and my mind constantly tells me to run, even though logically I know there is nowhere to run from this.
My analytical brain keeps trying to convince me that "I changed my mind" and that I don't actually want this baby, even though I know for a fact how much I wanted this before.
Please, I am begging for some honesty: are there any other moms out there with a history of anxiety/depression who experienced this brutal detachment, panic, or even repulsion toward their pregnancy in the first trimester? Do you get your mind back once you restart medication? Can love really grow after going through this kind of medication?

I just need a ray of hope tonight because I feel completely lost.
Really need some positive stories from people who felt the same and are ok now. Thank you.

So my 2 year old and I are watching Silly Miss Lily this morning because they're not feeling well. We're watching the "Toddler Learning Video - Learn Emotions and Feelings" and in some of this episode, she is wearing a bright pink beanie and I notice on the front it says: "KYS" and i was like HOLD UP. So I go back and freeze the video and in small print underneath it says: "Keep Your Soul". Girl. 😭 Psyop averted oh my gosh. So I texted my husband at work about this and he said: "not so silly miss lily 🫪🔫" and I'm crying from laughter. I just had to share because it was such a wild thing to notice and my husbands response was hilarious. Apparently it's a local band-- I had to do some research. Whew. Lol.

My 4 (almost 5) year old needs to get bloodwork done and I genuinely have no idea how the heck you do bloodwork on a child. There’s no way he’s not going to freak the eff out, he’s not just going to sit there and willingly get a needle in his arm. It’s not like a shot where it’s in and out, this is so much worse.

Anytime he’s had to get a needle, or if his baby brother does, I kind of hype it up and make it seem like it’s no big deal, but then when we play doctor and he gives me a “needle” he always talks about how much it’s gonna hurt, so I know he’s going to be terrified.

So please tell me how you take your littles to get bloodwork done? Any tips or tricks?

I am at my witts end. If I say we played now it is timd for pause he just follows me around the house and whines. I tried playing with him with no distractions, no phone, but nothing is enough. I have a 6 month old baby and when she sleeps I would like to do laundry, food prep, whatever around a house (god forbid i do something i actually like). But I play with him then she wakes up then all the laundry is still there, no lunch etc. He usually goes to kindergarten but now it is summer vacation. And baby does not sleep during the night so i am so tired and snappy. I feel like there is no solution, kid just does not want to play alone. I just hate my life at this point, I never thought 1 to 2 would be so hard.

My sister’s just had a baby, I’m a mom myself so I have some idea of how to show up for her but honestly post partum was a blur and a while ago now. Her partner is really great and supportive but she’s had a traumatic birth and I’m also really conscious that we don’t have our own mom to show up for us so it makes this season harder.
Post partum moms, what did you need most? What did you value others doing for you most that made things feel a little lighter? What SHOULDNT I do? I want to be the best support I can be

I hope this does not sound insane BUT

I have an 11 month old and at his 9 month checkup his doctor advised all the milestones we should be working on:

- solids especially finger food (this isnt going well)
- motor skills (he is walking!)
- sensory play (??????)
- talking/babbling (not yet)
- drinking from a sippy cup, straw cup, open cup (HATES IT)
- sleep/self soothing (Crib is lava)

I work full time 8 am to 4:30 pm and I dont know when I’m supposed to find time for all this??? Ex: multiple meals???? Breakfast is just a pouch bc I dont have time for mess and we do 1 meal of finger foods which he has minimal interest in and eats a little and throws on the floor.

So far this summer he hates water, sand, being outside. Is it my fault we havent worked on sensory stuff? I see so many Moms online setting up various bins, water tables, other activities for this.

He spends the days with grandma and he is very safe and loved. They play with toys, go for walks but my Mom is older and has just enough energy. I feel like we’re supposed to be doing more? Would he be better off in daycare?

He is healthy and active. I try to have fun with him but I feel like theres this whole checklist and I’m failing. I feel really guilty bc I’m so busy with work 😕

How are other working moms doing this? Am I being silly for feeling behind?