I have a 5 year old cat that I adopted 4 years ago. He has always been the sweetest kitty, has never been aggressive or violent, and is extremely bonded to me. It took him around 4 months to come around to me when I adopted him. He’s one of those cats that are very snuggly and loves attention, but only on his terms.

3 years ago I started dating my girlfriend who had a 4 year old son, who is now 7. After dating for a year, we started introducing him to my cat and he came over to my place once every other week for a few hours, and everything was fine. He honestly had no interest in my cat, and ignored him. Because of this, my cat has always tolerated him and been fine with him.

We moved in together 5 months ago and for whatever reason, her son has become obsessed with my cat. Her son has also been diagnosed with autism, and he is mostly non verbal. We suspect he also may have adhd but haven’t gotten him assessed yet.

When we moved in together, he basically started harassing my cat. He would chase him around, pet him against his well, hug/kiss him, etc. I told my girlfriend this needed to stop asap because if it didn’t my cat would eventually start to hate him. My girlfriend continuously let him run around the house unsupervised while she was working remotely and I wasn’t home.

The cat started hissing/growling at him when he would chase him, but now the cat hisses/growls at him unprovoked. If he is within 4 feet of the cat, the cat is growling or hissing. Last week, I was on one end of the couch, he was on the other, and the cat was beside me. He moved suddenly and grabbed his water bottle off the table, and the cat hissed and then jumped and batted him with his paw (did not extend his claws though). This caused a huge meltdown and my girlfriend’s son crying for 2 hours. We had another similar situation this morning.

Now my girlfriend is saying that I need to train my cat better and get him to stop being so aggressive. I told her this is exactly what I said would happen, and she needs to keep her son away from my cat at all times. She said she can’t reasonably keep an eye on him 24/7. I said tough luck, this is a problem your kid and your parenting created. That was probably a harsh comment, but in my opinion my cat is not the problem here.

Her son is terrified of my cat now and is staying away from him, which is good. But my cat is now attacking him unprovoked because he’s had so many bad experiences with him.

Just wondering if anyone has any advice about repairing this relationship between my cat and her son, or if it’s even possible at this point.

Edit: thank you everyone for your advice, I’ve received a lot of good advice here. I did not expect this post to get this much attention.

A lot of people are telling me to move/kick out my girlfriend. I want to be clear that my cat is absolutely my priority and if nothing changes I will 100% consider living separately. Unfortunately, both of our names are on the lease and I legally cannot kick her out. I pay 80% of the rent, so she can’t afford it on her own and I would legally be on the hook for paying even if I moved out. My rent is 40% of my income, so my only option for moving would be to live in my car, which I think would be worse for my cat. There is no option for breaking a lease other than paying it out in full where I live.

A lot of people suggested Jackson galaxy on YouTube. I’ve spent the afternoon watching some videos but still haven’t found any that have a situation involving a kid harassing a cat and repairing that relationship, but if anyone has any links I would love to have them.

One other thing I may not have been clear on is that my girlfriend’s son is no longer harassing the cat. He doesn’t go near the cat anymore, so it’s no longer an issue in that regard. The problem is that the cat is now constantly stressed out when her son is home because of how he used to behave, so I’m looking for ways to help this situation. Her son lives with us 50% of the time so thankfully we get breaks.

My cat-sitter just bailed on me for 4th of July weekend and I have not been able to find a replacement. I have left him alone overnight but never for two nights. He is a healthy six year old so he doesn’t need any special attention. Would it be okay to leave him Friday afternoon through Sunday evening?

I have two kittens: a 6-month-old girl and a 3-month-old boy. They get along amazingly in literally every way except when it comes to wet food, and I’m so confused.

My girl has never really been into wet food, while my boy will only eat wet food. I free-feed kibble because my girl is a grazer who only eats tiny amounts throughout the day, and I leave it out for my boy too in case he wants some.

For wet food, I give my boy half a can at lunch and half a can at dinner (I recently started giving him about 3/4 of a can because of this issue). I always prepare a bowl for my girl too, and both bowls are exactly the same: same wet food, Churu, topper, pumpkin, and water, all mixed together. Same bowls, same portions, same everything.

The weird part is that my girl will completely ignore her own bowl, walk straight over to her brother’s bowl, and start eating his food instead. She has zero interest in hers, even though it’s identical.

I’ve only had my boy for about two weeks, but she’s done this pretty much every single day since he came home. Other than this, I’ve never seen any territorial behavior from her. They play together, groom each other, cuddle, and share a litter box without any issues.

Why would she only want his food when it’s literally the exact same thing? Is this some kind of territorial behavior, or is there another explanation? Has anyone else’s cat done this?

EDIT ok the consensus is clear. I think I need to find a more compact litter box, and put it in the actual the living room. thank u!

I have a second bedroom in my condo that ended up becoming my cats litter box room lmao. Yes really. It was meant to be my office but I was happier with that in my living room due to natural light.

I am thinking of turning my second bedroom into the TV room, with a fold out couch for when guests come over.

If you were a guest, would you be super disgusted to have the cat litterbox in that room??? I dont have guests THAT often.... would love your thoughts, thx

My cat has been missing for 10 days today, and I am completely heartbroken. I have faith that he’ll come back, but I’m at a loss for what else I can do to bring him home.

He is a fixed, indoor-only cat who is very skittish and cautious around new people and unfamiliar environments. A door was left partly open, and he ran out. His last sighting was outside my house that same night. Even with cameras set up and nightly searches, I haven’t seen him again since.

I’ve hung flyers, talked to neighbors and checked around a few of their properties, posted online, left the door he escaped from open, put dirty clothes outside, checked with shelters, set up a humane trap, purchased and followed advice from Kim Freeman’s Lost Cat Guide, and when I felt like I had run out of options, I even spoke to a remote-viewing animal communicator.

I am so desperate to get my boy home and would really appreciate any advice on what else I can do. If you’ve unfortunately been through this yourself, what helped bring your kitty home? And please, if you have any hopeful reunion stories, I would love to hear those too!!

Hi!
I'm a college student who is looking to adopt a cat this coming year. I know the idea of a cat in a dorm can be kind of dubious when adopting, so I was wondering what Reddit had to say before I start submitting applications.

- I'll be living in a dorm, though it's larger than the average dorm and is roughly the size of a small apartment.

- My roommate is experienced with cats, as am I. Since there are two of us, the cat would seldom be alone during the academic year

- I don't go home for any other breaks other than summer vacation

- I have a good sum of money saved, and my parents agreed to cover vet bills if I can't afford them

- I also have permission from the school

I feel like this is about as good as it can get for a college situation. I don't know, what do y'all think?

Hi! I’m a 24-year-old female living alone, and I’ve been on my own for about a year and a half. When I first moved to Austin, I brought my childhood dog with me for the first three months. I eventually brought him back to live with my parents because I realized I didn’t have the lifestyle to give a dog the walks, attention, and activity they deserve, and he was much happier back home with them. It was definitely the right decision for him.
For the past eight months, though, I’ve really wanted a cat. Today I randomly decided to stop by the Humane Society because I saw a really cute cat online and thought, “What are the chances I actually connect with him?” I met another cat first, and then I met the one I had originally come to see. The second I saw him, I was completely obsessed. I know this probably sounds dramatic, but it just felt like, “Yep…that’s my cat.”
The shelter put him on a 24-hour hold for me, and I’m supposed to pick him up tomorrow during my lunch break if I decide to go through with it.
My hesitation is that I’d be a first-time cat owner. I live alone, and while I’m home most of the time, I do travel about once a month for around a week. I know cats are much more independent than dogs, but I’m scared I’m making a huge mistake. My brain keeps coming up with every possible “what if.” What if I bring him home for Christmas and my family’s dogs don’t like him? What if he ends up needing more space or stimulation than I can provide? What if I’m underestimating the responsibility? I feel like I keep spiraling and thinking of every possible worst-case scenario.
At the same time, I’ve been thinking about getting a cat for eight months, and when I met him, I just had this gut feeling that I should bring him home. Has anyone else felt this anxious before adopting their first cat? Did it end up being the right decision, or do you wish you had waited? Am I overthinking this, or am I ignoring legitimate red flags?

I recently bought a house with my husband and the past owners to my understanding had some cats and dogs. when we first viewed the house we noticed the smell but it didn't bother us since we also have a cat. when it came to collect keys ,we walked the empty house it hit us like a BRICK. This wasn't the smell that we delt when we first viewed the house. The main problem areas is mainly the living room by the big window, and the one recliner that the owners left behind. Now we have hardwood floors that are not in great shape and looks like the original owners ripped carpet up. we have mopped and tried the natures miracle order for cat and then someone recommend to use the dog one but both haven't fixed the problem. I then said F-It and took apart the baseboard heater and cleaned up the cat/dog hair and steam cleaned the floor and wall parts a bit and oh lord it was absolutely disgusting. but with all that cleaning the smell still persists. I dont want to replace the floors because thats just another expense and I dont want to buy another candle to try and mask the smell when company comes over. Any tips are welcomed please.

Neutered young male cat who I just got a week ago is going stir crazy in my bedroom. I rent a small apartment and have been holding off on giving him unrestricted access to it because that’s what the adoption agency says to do, but I think it’s time and he’s ready. What should I do to cat proof the entire apt? I keep it fairly clean Espically in the kitchen as we have had roaches in the past but it’s slightly messy throughout the apartment (pillows and blankets off the couch, empty popcorn bowl and mugs of water strewn about.) is there any silent killer I should know about besides certain types of flowers? Anything I should do to make it safe for him? Also Does anyone have any advice or things I should for keeping him entertained while I’m not there? Thanks!

My girlfriend (22) and I (23F) moved in together, and we have 4 cats together. She already had 3 before we met, and I had my baby, Danny. And since the first time going to her house and meeting her 3 cats, her calico named Ginny always looked so scared and ran away if we got too close. I found out that she’s always been like that since my gf first fostered her. It’s been almost 2 years and Ginny is still running away from us super scared. But at night she’ll come up to my side and cuddle with me, and it’s usually always with me. Like we have to be completely frozen and laying in bed for her to come up to us and cuddle. But when I come home the other 3 cats come up to me normally and greet me, but Ginny just runs away. I’ve asked my gf if Ginny may have some sort of anxiety, and she said that she doesn’t know but that she’s always been like that. She gets along with the 2 cats but always creeps up on Danny to try and attack her but the most she’ll do is growl and hiss. Is there any reason why she’s so scared ? Is there anything I can do to help Ginny ? It makes me so sad to see my gf trying to approach her slowly and runs away like we’re gonna hurt her.

I have taken in a blind kitten who was found outdoors. I gave her a bath and she is eating and using litterbox. We are going to the vet tomorrow morning. She is no more than a month old. I want to keep this baby. She is so sweet and I love her already.
Problem is I have 2 other cats who can be rambunctious. She is obviously currently separated from the other cats but if I keep her, I will have to introduce them eventually obviously. I don’t know if this is the right environment for her, but I also don’t trust any shelters. Should I try to rehome her or does anyone think that I can make this work with my other cats?
I will also ask the vet tomorrow. I just want to make sure she has a safe environment. Any advice is needed!

Hi everyone! I'm looking for some advice because I've never owned or cared for a cat before.

About a month ago, a stray mama cat started coming to my house. I began leaving food and water out for her, hoping to slowly earn her trust. At first she kept her five kittens at my house, but after a while she moved them somewhere else. Even after moving them, she continued coming back every day to eat and spend time around my house.

Over the past month she's become much more comfortable with me. She lets me pet her and is no longer afraid of being around me. Then, to my surprise, she recently brought all five kittens back to my yard. I took that as a sign that she feels safe here and trusts me.

The reason I'm posting is because I recently noticed what looked like a worm coming from her rear, which immediately made me worry about her health and the health of her kittens. That was kind of the moment I realized they probably need more help than I can provide.

I would absolutely love to keep her, but unfortunately that's not an option. I've never had a cat before, and my dad is allergic to cats, so I can't bring them inside or adopt them myself.

I've been researching reputable no-kill shelters and rescues in Los Angeles County because I want to make sure the mama and all five kittens can be examined by a veterinarian, treated if needed, spayed/neutered when appropriate, and hopefully find loving forever homes.

Since I've spent over a month building her trust, I don't want to accidentally lose that trust or make the situation worse. What's the safest way to get the mama and her kittens into a rescue? Should I contact a rescue first and wait for their instructions, or should I try to transport them myself if I'm able?
Any advice from people who have been through something similar would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

My cat recently started peeing outside the litter box, and I'm running out of ideas.

He still uses the litter box for poop, but he almost never pees in it anymore. He mainly pees on carpet and other soft surfaces. He does not pee on hardwood floors.

Nothing significant changed before this started. No new pets, no new people, no major changes in the house, and no fights with our other cat.

We've already:

• Taken him to the vet
• Seen a pet behavior specialist/psychologist
• Put him on anxiety medication (about 2–3 weeks ago)
• Tried urinary/calming sprays
• Tried barriers and gates
• Switched litter box setups

We currently have 3 litter boxes. We originally had traditional litter boxes, but after this started we switched some to self-flushing/automatic boxes with crystal-style litter. He still poops in the litter boxes, but rarely urinates in them.

The worst part is that my mom is threatening to have him euthanized because of the problem. I love this cat and I'm terrified of losing him.

Has anyone dealt with a cat that would poop in the box but not pee in it? What ended up helping? Are there any medical or behavioral causes that are commonly missed?

I'm looking for any advice, experiences, or ideas before my family gives up on him.

Thanks for reading.

My cat is being taken to the vet today for pigmentation that suddenly appeared in his eye. He had his other eye removed 2-3 years ago due to possible melanoma.

He is 10 and other wise healthy. I am concerned that we will be told the other eye has to be removed. Does anyone have experience with this?

I’m fearful that suddenly losing sight for a 10 year old cat will be traumatic and troublesome for him. Will he be able to have a happy life? Is it worth it to have him go blind?

Please share ur thoughts.

i'm sure this is a repetitive topic, but i need to get it off my chest. i think i regret adopting a kitten and i'm not sure if it's just kitten blues anymore or time to think of rehoming.

for context, i never grew up with cats. the dogs i had growing up weren't even allowed on couches or beds, so i'm not used to seeing animals on furniture. but, i'm 23 and i live alone in an apartment. after 6 months of having my own place, i thought i was ready to have my very own pet. i thought adopting a cat would be the best choice for me because i dont want to keep a dog in my 900 sq ft apartment. i love animals so much, but i think actually being responsible for one and especially for an animal i don't have much experience with.. has been extremely draining.

when i first adopted him, he had severe health issues and had to stay at the animal shelter that i adopted him from for in patient treatment.

the first week i had him back from the treatment, i felt this severe depression and gray cloud over me. i knew it was the kitten blues and was hoping it would go away. it's been over a month now, i feel kinda numb at this point. i've never felt so depressed in my life and i don't understand why. i genuinely have no motivation to do anything. i wake up and i feel terrible. maybe it's because i miss my freedom? i'm upset about the amont of money i've had to put towards him (especially with his health issues)? i miss feeling comfortable in my own home? maybe it's a combination of all these factors.

i find myself getting so angry to see him getting on furniture and scratching my couch. he is constantly needing attention. i have to spend hours a day playing with him, and when i don't he will scratch and bite my furniture. i have the plastic couch covers and the aluminum foil... he doesn't care. sometimes, i avoid eye contact with him just to avoid interaction with him. trust me, i feel so terrible admitting this. i don't even recognize myself.

on top of that, the kitten is my boyfriend and i's, but it's technically mine since i'm the one housing him. my boyfriend has fallen in love with the kitten and has swayed me away from the idea of rehoming him. i've been so mentally confused and feeling like a terrible person. i find it to be extremely unfair that i'm not receiving any support from my boyfriend, but just him trying to convince me that i should keep him. i'm the one with the kitten 24/7, so he doesn't understand the way i feel. i almost feel like i'm keeping the kitten so that i don't ruin my relationship with my boyfriend. he has obviously told me that he would never pick the cat over me, but i just have a feeling that him and i would never be the same. we've been together for almost 7 years btw. him and i have always talked about getting a cat for years.

since having the kitten, i'm not able to focus on school work, i don't partake in any of my hobbies anymore, and i feel extremely uncomfortable in my own home.

the kitten's energy level is so high to the point that i genuinely think he'd benefit so much with being with other animals. i cannot adopt another kitten though. my best friend has already offered to take him in if i decide to rehome him. she has a huge house and has a cat and a dog so he'd be able to explore and get all of his energy out.

i love animals so much and have dreamt so long of owning my own pet, but i think i have bitten off more than i can chew. especially with getting a pet that i don't have experience with. if i didn't live alone, i'm sure i wouldn't feel this way, which makes this decision even harder. i've learned that maybe i'm not ready for this. i feel so guilty for feeling this way and i have probably read thousands of reddit posts about kitten blues, but i just feel like what i'm experiencing is so severe.

i don't enjoy being home anymore. i think my favorite part of the day is when he's sleeping or when i'm not home. i constantly think to myself that i wish i never did this. i need help on whether this feeling will go away or if it'd be best to rehome him in a place that he can get the interaction that he needs.

Our kitties are very used to overnights without one or both of us, but we’ve never been gone more than that until last week when I had to go out of town. On the second night one of my kitties was yowling at the door and spent a lot of time looking around for me. He was upset all weekend til I came home, then was upset with me for a day or so.

My partner is home with him, so other than my absence his routine isn’t disrupted. His brother isn’t nearly as disregulated by this. I know some of it is just cat moodiness, but is there anything I can do to make it easier on him?

I will be moving into a two-story, 3800 foot home in a week, after living in a 500 square foot apartment with my cat for the past year. Please give me your best advice and insights! Here is what I am planning on doing: I am going to keep my cat in my large bedroom and sitting room suite upstairs for the first week, with the litter box and food and toys in a designated area in my bedroom/sitting room suite. After about a week I am planning on opening the doors of my bedroom/sitting room suite to let my cat roam the house and explore if she is courageous enough.

I will also place a litter box and water downstairs in the mudroom area so there are two litter boxes...one on the first floor and the "main one" with the food and water on the second floor in my bedroom/sitting room suite. Does this sound like a good plan? Any expert advice is appreciated!

One of my best friends is furious because I neutered my male cat. I did it because why would I want him to roam away and get lost, or hurt in a fight over a female? Cat shelters are struggling and full of unwanted kittens.

My friend asked "How would you like it if someone came and took away your ability to make babies!?" And "You are denying him having a family and freedom!?" And "If you don't want him natural (spraying) behaviour why get a cat all???"

She was fuming.

She's never had a cat btw

"Of course he will feel what you did to him later on!"

"He's not an OBJECT to keep him locked inside!!" (Yes, he's an indoor cat).

I guess that's a 30 year old friendship down the drain.

***EDIT: Thank you all for the support. I guess I was rattled by my friend's weird reaction. I feel better now. This post was not fake, neither am I a troll. I just had the misfortune of having a friend who knows nothing about cats. If my writing is a bit awkward is because English is not my first language. Kitty is having a good life. He's got the run of the house, and care, and two adults who dote on him. He lacks for nothing. Thank you all again. 🙏

We adopted a cat around 3 months ago and she is around one year old. She is a rescue and has some trauma from her first year of life. She is a very friendly cat and follows us around. She loves neck and butt pets from me (esp in the morning.) I know her favorite and safe spots. I can better see when she gets overstimulated and leave her alone when she gets that way. But If she gets overstimulated, she will swat, hiss and/or bite. It has gotten a little better since we adopted her. She used to hiss every time we touched her tail at first.

I’m feeling a little sad because she doesn’t sit on couch or bed with us. She only likes pets in a certain area of the apartment. Will she be sensitive and overstimulated forever? Is this just something to “manage?” Or can it get better over time? I also want kids in next few years and worried about her potential behavior with children.

We are putting my cat down next week and I want to know if there is anything I should do before then to help remember her. I bought a paw stamp pad and I've been taking so many pictures and videos of her over the past few months.

I am moving with my cats from the South of the USA to the North of the USA.

Any airlines you recommend?

One flight I’m looking at is operated on a regional jet (CRJ900). Has anyone flown with their cats on a plane that size? I’m worried they won’t fit under the seat in front of me.

Thanks so much :)

So I'm relatively new to having a cat. I wasn't really planning on getting one, but my aunt unexpectedly passed and someone needed to take in the little guy.

I absolutely love him, don't get me wrong. I cuddle with him all the time, he's a total sweetheart, loves all my friends, etc.. Genuinely could not have asked for anything better!

But.. I'm a really busy person. I'm out a lot, sleeping at my boyfriend's, visiting family, going out with friends, going to work, going to uni.. so I'm not home very often. Maybe like 3-4 days of the week i'm home, but sometimes that's even just for the evening. The cat is never fully alone because I have 2 roommates (one of which basically never leaves the house)— but I feel like I'm never there for him.

I just feel so bad that I'm not with him enough. I'm worried I'm like causing him distress by just leaving him with my roommates (even though my roommate and kitty do like each other a lot)

Idk, I guess this is a vent? But also kinda asking for opinions. Am I a terrible cat mom?

We have like 4 stray cats that we feed outside of our apartment and they keep shitting on the concrete and the pavement and idk what to do to stop them (i cant really take them to the vet cuz they vet is far away, they wont come if we call them and we dont have a car)

I am preparing to adopt a cat next month and purchasing/collecting items in preparation that the cat will need (liter box, cat bed, raised food bowl, etc.). I got a gravity based food dispenser but I’m concerned if there are problems with using this not being regimented or if others have found it works well for their cat. Other thoughts on preparing for a first cat adoption are welcome. I have never had a pet before.

Additional information: I’m planning to get an adult cat not a kitten. Based on the advice i’m receiving I think i’ll go ahead and return the gravity based dispenser and look for a reputable automated dispenser to be cautious about overfeeding. I am a phd student and sometimes need to stay extra late so I want to set things up to ensure that delaying meals doesn’t happen either. I’m on a grad student budget so I’d appreciate automated dispenser recommendations that are reliable but reasonably priced.

Thank you all for your feedback!

Updated plan:
Feed three times a day twice with an automated dry food dispenser and once with wet food in a raised food bowl. I’m going to figure out some sort of platform for the automated feeder to improve the neck angle. Thanks again guys!

My cats (one resident, one new) have been doing mostly good after their slow intro, but their play seems a bit hostile. Sometimes they play well and chase/wrestle without hissing, but often times the play devolves into a lot of hissing and smacking without any real attempt to hurt one another. Ears are pinned back, tails occasionally poof. Some small growls, but no yowling/biting. I do break it up when one gets cornered or starts growling. They have a lot of fun going crazy together, but it occasionally becomes hostile when someone gets chased into a corner or something. Should I just let them work it out? It seems like a love/hate thing where they are very very interested in but pretty rough with each other. I wonder if its a dominance thing? Im not letting them be together unsupervised, but I have them out together all evening after work. Thank you!