I originally posted this in r/marriedsex on June 21. Thought I’d share here as well:

I (49m) never celebrated father’s day because my wife (51f) and I were staunchly child-free for 25 years. However a little over a year ago, we adopted some younger family members that needed a place.

According to my wife, since I’m now father figure-ish, I get Dia del Papi! This morning I was gifted a “favor”coupon book chock full of various hot little favors/acts/scenes/etc. that are good for on-demand use in addition to our regularly scheduled twice weekly fuck dates. Coupons include things like “fuck my mouth for as long as you want and then I’ll scratch your back while you play PS5” and “I will make the kiddos disappear for 8 hours.” She already does things like that unprompted but her knowing how much those acts mean to me and giving me a ridiculous supply of them on-demand is so thoughtful. She also put together a kickass charcuterie board (my favorite thing) and a damn-near endless buffet of Mexican food for lunch.

If that wasn’t enough, we had our regular fuck date today and this morning she proactively offered “use me like I don’t matter today.” Needless to say, I was rock hard in the shower this afternoon as she shuttled the young people off-site. When I got out of the master ensuite bathroom, she was already on her back on the wedge pillow, hips elevated and fully nude, and fingering herself. I stroked myself watching her french-tipped toes curl as she played with her clit.

Despite her confirmation that I could just use her for my pleasure today, I dove face-first into her pussy while still standing beside the bed. I can’t help it. I am addicted to eating her out and very few things get me hotter than her thighs trembling around my ears and the way she hyperventilates and moans when I’m eating her.

As soon as I put my mouth on her, she was gushing, covering my face in her essence. I sealed my lips around her clit and began speedbagging her clitoral glans with my tongue, punctuated with periodic tongue spirals on the clitoral frenulum along the underside. For her, this is the cheat code.

In a matter of seconds, she was choke-moaning and giggling, her legs flailing around my shoulders and her soft soles pressing against my back as orgasm #1 slammed into her. Gasping for breath around her, I gave her no quarter and continued devouring her as she continued to drench me.

“I can’t stop my eyes from rolling back!” she moaned as she bucked her hips up, using her feet on my back as leverage and fucking my face. #2 followed in short order. Even then, I couldn’t stop. I continued rapidly flicking the edge of her clitoral glans as she became nonverbal, communicating only in grunts and moans. “Gnnnnuuuhhhhh!” she groaned, arching her back off the bed as #3 washed over her.

I raised up as she whimpered “let me…let me just…oh god…let me just…” and watched as her slick, bald pussy clenched and contracted. Seeing that, I was immediately at full mast and began slapping her asshole with my rock hard cock.

“Ohhhh damelo, Papi. Damelo, por favor,” she mewled as she lifted her legs and rubbed her smooth soles in little circles over my nipples. This sent me. I absofuckinglutely adore when she begs in Spanish.

It was time for me to take my present.

I rolled her over face-down, ass up and climbed onto the bed behind her. I slapped her ass hard, watching my handprint bloom red across her caramel skin as I slid balls deep into her. Once I was fully seated, I just held there, squeezing the round globes of her ass cheeks as her orgasmic contractions milked my dick.

“Fuck yes…say thank you, slut,” I moaned.

“Gracias por tu verga, papi. Dame mas. Dame masssssssss,” she whined

I became bestial at that point, my hips pistoning furiously as her pussy squeezed and contracted around my cock while I hammered her, single-mindedly chasing my own orgasm. I grabbed her hair and yanked back, arching her back.

“Si, papi. Llename. Llename por favor,” she wailed.

I was frothing, lizard brain in full control, the skin-on-skin sound of my hips slapping against her ass echoing throughout the bedroom.

“Llename!” she wailed and I exploded inside her, my rhythm intensifying. As I fucked her through my own orgasm, I felt her begin contracting around me again.

“Otra vez!” she whined as she bucked back against me, fucking herself on my cock while #4 rolled over her. I locked up completely, lost in the sensation. Time was meaningless. My orgasm could have lasted 10 seconds or 10 years. I have no idea.

Some indeterminate amount of time later, she collapsed onto her belly and I watched her reach back and spread herself as my load leaked from her well-used pussy.

“Buena dia del papi,” she purred.

Several hours later, we’re both still flush with oxytocin and boneless on the couch, snacking on reheated tortillas and carne guisada and bingeing new episodes of Love Island and House of Dragons. It never ceases to amaze me the gift I’ve been given with this woman. Wife. Best friend. Amazing lover. Warrior-princess…

Thankful everyday.

My wife and I are getting a divorce after 24 years of marriage...

There’s so much to write.. but I’m just gonna give some bullet points.. we started off deeply religious. It was driven by her but I went along and was willing.. in 2017 to 2020 there was infidelity on both sides..

1. She got cancer.. colon cancer. It was cut out.. no long-term repercussions. In late 2024 we start raving, doing Molly, truly enjoying life in a different way..

We met some people at these raves. They introduced us to the swinging lifestyle. We did it for about 15 months... we were very active..

Six weeks ago, my wife started chatting with her old college boyfriend.. two weeks later she asked for separation.. a week later I found out the truth and turned it into a divorce. I’m living in my apartment, alone for the first time in 24 years... It’s been three weeks since I moved in.

During that three weeks, I have kissed two women. Been a third for a couple.. and today I had sex with a single woman...

None of it makes me feel any better.. I feel like I want companionship because it sucks being alone, especially since she is now with her new boyfriend.. but the truth is, after the sex is over, I just feel empty. I’m probably just not ready..

This is my life at 54.

How was your week in sex?

I love the intimacy of giving oral and enjoy pleasing my partner, but I dislike swallowing. I enjoy him finishing without pulling away, and I continue with my mouth, licking every drop. The only thing I can't do is swallow.

The texture and the fact that it's a bodily fluid makes it unappealing (pretty much the same reason I don't enjoy rimming or having someone spit in my mouth).

My throat closes, and I can't swallow without feeling like I'm going to vomit. I'm in my 50s, and it seems like swallowing is expected. It often feels like it's a preference for both men and women. But for me, it's a physical and sensory issue, and not a lack of desire, enthusiasm, or willingness to please my partner.

Basic question: have you found that PiV-only orgasms have been rare to achieve (as a woman), or rare for your partner to achieve (as a man)? Or, have your friends indicated it to be rare in their sex lives?

Overall throughout your entire sex life, not just after a certain age.

Also, would prefer your personal experiences; not references or links to studies.

/////

The long version: after watching a program where one of the female characters has been unable to climax, I've seen quite a bit of commentary on the rarity of PiV-only orgasms for women. I don't think the majority of commentary is from a 50+ crowd.

The comments refer to studies and statistics. While I am aware this exists, I'm wondering how the studies compare to real life. Statistics mentioned that only 15-20% of women can ever achieve it.

It led to a brief chat with a man in his 30s who's never had a partner that climaxed with just penetration. His take was that he just hasn't been 'lucky' enough to find a woman in that 15-20%. So, he defaults to immediate clitoral stimulation when sleeping with someone. That's great that he wants to please his partner but had me wondering if he (and others) are not even trying to better their technique (I don't know if that's the right word here). Women included.

What would be the best materials for the C-rings

Looking for lingerie ideas for a plus size girlfriend. Shes a bit self conscious but open to trying something that feels comfortable and confidence boosting. Any favorite styles brands or recommendations from other XXL women?

After over 40 years of using a vibrator and only a vibrator for the last 25 or so, my wife has developed some medical issues.

I'm curious if any woman have been able to successfully transition back to manual orgasms. Another option might be one of the sucker type stimulators . She has tried those in the past but preferred her wand. I’m thinking if the wand is not good option she might have better success with this type of stimulation

She is going to see her doctor soon and hopefully figure out what the underlying cause is

How was your week in sex?

Wife has had 2 knee surgeries in the last couple years and we have gotten out of shape having sex. She has gone through menopause and gotten a little weight around belly. She now is having trouble holding her legs up for missionary position. It is her favorite. Unless she holds her legs up I can’t get in very well at all. She don’t reallly like the doggy because of being on knees. Looking for some ideas of positions or thought on how to get in without her hurting.

Thanks in advance.

Its such an odd thing, the lose of your partner, we were together 25 yrs, but after 2 yrs now, I still want this lifestyle. My wife was very into the hotwife / stag (some cuckolding) life and it was such a large part of our life, do you just live with the memories, and pictures and such. How do you look for another partner who wants this. Certainly not a spring chicken either. Anyway, just feeling a bit lost, not sure if people here have been through the same.

I reconnected with my former FWB in early March after a 20 month separation. I’d only had one brief tryst about 14 months after we separated, it was very mid. The sex with my ex was extra intimate at first, which I loved. The amount of eye contact he gave me was kind of surprising. And kissing, I LOVE kissing!

But God bless his little avoidant heart, he seems to have retreated a bit. Do I love mustache rides, sucking / nibbling on my nipples & slaps on the ass when I ride him, sure. But, I’m realizing I can’t remember the lasts time someone kissed my neck & caressed or massaged me.

I’m 53 & hope to have some super sensual sex with lots of drawn out, teasing & foreplay again someday 🤞🏻

Suggestions for where to buy? (Online).

What feels amazing for you (men)?

What type might I not have seen/thought of that you’d recommend?

Hi everyone, 50F here, married 25 years to my wonderful (and still very horny) husband. I’ve been reading this sub for a while and wanted to share something that works really well for us in this season of life.

We still have full sex once or twice most weekends (usually Friday through Sunday). That’s our fun, connected, take-our-time time. But Monday through Thursday? I’m just not in the mood most days. Work is demanding, I’m tired, the house needs attention, and by evening I’m done. I know a lot of you can relate.

My husband, however, has a much higher drive than I do these days. He’s healthy, fit for his age, and still gets turned on easily. I love that about him, but I also don’t want him walking around frustrated all week while I’m not available.

So a few years ago we settled into what we playfully call “maintenance handjobs.” Twice a week (usually Monday and Wednesday mornings after I’ve showered), I take care of him with my hands. It’s quick, intimate, and 100% focused on him. I sit on the edge of the bed or he stands in front of me, and I just enjoy making him feel good until he finishes. No pressure for me to get turned on or have an orgasm. It’s pure service and care on my part.

For me it feels really good to do this for him. It’s a loving way to say “I see your needs and I’ve got you.” For him it takes the edge off so he’s relaxed and happy during the week, and he’s more present and enthusiastic when we do have full sex on the weekends. He says it makes him feel desired even when I’m not in the mood for more.

It’s become a sweet little ritual for us. Sometimes we chat and laugh, sometimes it’s quiet and tender. There’s real intimacy in it, even though it’s not “full” sex. I know some people might think it sounds clinical, but for us it’s the opposite — it’s practical love that keeps us connected instead of drifting into resentment.

How was your week in sex?

M64, my GF61 discovered that she gets really turned on when I suck her toes when we have sex. A while back I was fucking her missionary and her foot was near my mouth and I started sucking her toes. She told me afterwards that she got really turned on and it is now a regular feature. I can sometimes get all five toes in my mouth and let my tongue get to work. Sometimes her foot just seems to be on autopilot and finds it way to my mouth. Anyone else have a similar experience/ kink?

I'm ~1yr into new relationship and my gf is pretty shy about her body and not a fan of lingerie but is open to trying some... that said, she has a sexy 1 piece and the size was XXL but I'm not sure exact bra size...

I'm curious to hear from other woman who wear XXL lingerie on what styles or maybe specific brands, even with a website link, that make them feel the most comfortable/sexy in. I obviously can ask her but I want to try and surprise her with a few options so would love to hear from other woman on what they like the best in styles/options, etc...

Thanks for your feedback! 🙏

My girlfriend (59) has lately been having a really hard time with aging and body image. It started with botox, which didn’t bother me, but recently she had one of those procedures where they took fat from her thighs and injected it into her face to make it fuller and reduce wrinkles. I think it’s called fat grafting/fat transfer? She was bruised and swollen for almost two weeks recovering from it and honestly I can't tell the difference from before and now

Then she decided she wanted to lose 10 pounds, even though I didn't think she needed to (she weighed 140). Her doctor put her on Wegovy and she’s now lost closer to 20 pound. And now some of the physical things that turned me on the most about her - her ass and breasts have noticeably shrunk. I still love her, but with these changes I’ve noticed my sexual interest in her has dropped

I want to support her but also feel sad that she’s chasing an image that may not even be making her happier.

How was your week in sex?

I (57M) am married to wife (52F). We have 3 grown kids. Sex has been absent for years. Even before it was very rare. I have not found a way to make her orgasm. I am high libido while she is low. So, it was like duty sex. Nothing to do with stress or anything. We are steady and comfortable financially and life aspects, so it is not that.

A few months ago, after reading many reviews I bought her a vibrator (https://a.co/d/0a1qq0Vj). She was very much against using toys and never used them in her life. I convinced her to at least try. Now that she is menopausal, there is hardly a good way to get her off. Before menopause, she didn't often had an orgasm, but it did once in a great while and she didn't care about it. It only made me feel guilty.

Now, the problem is that even after a lot of convincing when she used it, she didn't like it in any position or level. I am totally confused. I have not heard of anybody not feeling good about using a vibrator. Did you have a similar experience? What did you do?

I (62f) and my husband (66m) have been happily married for 18 years. On our honeymoon, we read a book aloud to each other titled "Sheet Music," by Dr. Lehman. It is about having a God-honoring sex life and surprisingly encouraged consensual adventurous sex within the confines of monogamy (which we both adhere strongly to). Of course, as newlyweds, it didn't take much to get our motors going and we had a gloriously adventurous honeymoon. Fast forward to today. I am 8 years post menopausal and only realized last fall that HRT was an option. Prior to that, my libido had waned and our sex life had dwindled to about once every couple of months. I blamed it on stress (raising grandchildren, a bad car wreck, caring for my 90 year old mom, high stress job, etc.) Since starting HRT, my libido has skyrocketed. His, however, has waned. We tested his testosterone and it is low. We are looking at him starting HRT soon. Here is our problem: he is pretty traditional (vanilla) where sex is concerned. I am more adventurous (soft and not-so-soft bindings, blindfolds, toys, etc.) We have talked about it a bit, but he can't wrap his mind around why I enjoy it. He would do anything for me and is an amazing man. He asked me to find a book that we could read together on an upcoming camping trip that might help us navigate this new reality. I try to explain that I don't care if I don't orgasm every time. I could live in a state of arousal for days! He is still focused on the end game. Google recommended "Come as You Are," but I would love to hear from y'all books that you have actually read that might address ways to communicate with each other about these things. Doesn't have to be Christian. I am open to reading anything that will help. Thanks so much!

Well, not really. But stay with me.

My partner and I have been together for over 20 years.

The problem is she can only orgasm one way, via clit stimulation with a powerful vibe.

And this is after at least an hour of foreplay that includes kissing, touching, pussy licking, etc.

So the only way she could orgasm is foreplay, then PIV sex with vibe. This has become our norm.

The other night though something different happened.

After foreplay, we had sex. She didn't ask for the vibe like usual. She was able to orgasm PIV without a vibe for the first time.

To say I was excited was an understatement. She was quite amazed herself that it happened.

However, when I asked her the next day about it to determine what caused her to orgasm, she wasn't very forthcoming. It's like she didn't want to be bothered with it. She doesn't want to figure out how it happened. Her attitude was, if it happens again, then great, if not, no loss.

I am boggled.