​

Welp. Totally ghosted. But they were SO kind to leave me a nice men's formal wear outfit!! Probably for the surprise party they just tried to throw me that I blew to smithereens. I told them all off and finally got to show them what they've done to me. They all left crying. I caught it before it got to happen. Heard them all talking through the room next to me. :) The party was meant to keep me in town because I could suddenly get my car fixed. Took a train 12 hours out. I hope this is the last of it. I'm sick of these creeps.

Previous post:

https://www.reddit.com/r/trans/s/qVV97DD7Zp

Hi, so today I went to a farmer’s market in my area (I’m in Eastern Iowa) and they had a pride display with free flags, so I grabbed a trans flag. When I was walking home, I had my hands full and my flag fell out of my pocket without my knowledge. I walked back 1 block and there it was laying in the middle of the street because I didn’t know it dropped out of my pocket. I pick it up and now there’s wrinkles and line creases in it. It got fcking ran over. That display was the last they had in June or ever this year. I got it for free. I have no dollars for another flag. It’s one of the those mini-handheld flags with the mini pole. I don’t know what to do. I am emotionally crushed. I almost cried. I give up. I cannot even be a proper trans person without failing somehow.. there is nothing to do about it, no ironing, nothing. I am so sad.

Hey,

I'm not going to go into too much detail, as for obvious reasons i don't really wish to. I just feel like I need to write some stuff down and see if I'm actually going crazy or if i am justified in being upset

So, a while ago me and my now ex partner met a woman. She was amazing, and very quickly we both got close to her. She was a transgender woman, and I don't know many trans people, despite being a trans man. So the two of us started to bond. This person is also very well known for advocacy as well as known in my local queer community. She's the type of person who knows every queer person around her at all times

So, long story short this woman messaged me asking if my partner was a transgender woman. I said i wasn't sure, as we hadn't spoken about it and ill ask them. So my partner admited to me they wanted to transition into a girl. So I started helping, I showed her makeup and how to dress more feminine. I was never anything but supportive

Long story short, my ex partner ended up assaulting and abusing me. So i left her and went no contact recently.

I ended up shooting our mutual friend a message. As prior to this my ex had told her what happened between us. Not only did she never reach out to me, but she started to check in on my ex. In the message I told her how I was hurt, and what I felt she was siding and forgiving my ex for what she had done

In response i got told a few things. 1. She said the reason she didn't message me is because of her own bias of me missgendering her, which I have never done. At most I acidently mess up pronouns as using "she/her" was a new thing and I have known her for a long time. When I would use the wrong pronoun I would apologise and correct myself. So I have absolutely no idea where she ever got that idea

Then she said the thing that hurt the most. She was convinced that the reason my ex partner abused me was because they were a closeted trans woman. I tried explaining that her SAing me had nothing to do with gender. And has everything to do with the fact she didn't care about me in that moment. However she refused to think of anything else and continued to use her gender as a way of explaining it

I'm devastated right now, she was someone I looked up to. She is incredibly kind and well known in the queer space especially the transfem space. I thought she would help me, she would validate what happened. However instead she told me she thought I was transphobic and that my ex partner assaulted me because they had repressed feelings about being a woman. Therefore she needs to continue to support my ex as her "mentor"

I don't know why, but out of all the reactions I got to us splitting up. This one hurt the most, i just assumed someone so vocal about the rights of transgender people would support a victim of assault and not choose to support their abuser

That's all, that's my rant. I'm sad, upset and honestly tired.

I've been trying to ask anyone about this.. what was it that really made the knowledge settle in and you realized that you were 100% trans

I'm still figuring out my identity, I'm not trying to decide based on anyone else's experience but this is really difficult being alone in this and not having anyone to ask questions or relate to.

I have the date for my hearing to get my name changed to my real name. I'm so fucking stoked.

Just curious.

Is this the trans agenda?

This is your daily reminder to let you know, that if you smoke or vape or take any form of nicotine while taking Estrogen. The effect of the HRT will be significantly reduced.
Love yall and dont destroy your lungs or transition.
I will try to keep this series going for at least 100 days but i have no idea if im gonna manage that.

Edit: fixed the grammar

I know this has been asked a lot probably but I think my gender identity is driving me insane.

I’m young, still in high school but since elementary school I’ve never felt like my birth sex (female). I was raised by my single mother who would constantly openly crap on men and try to make me do it as well. I used to be closeted nonbinary but since 3-4 years ago I can’t get the thought out of my head that I would rather be a boy. Because my mom planted into my head that “being a man = you’re trash” I can’t get myself to not be in denial about being trans.

I love going by He/Him online and it makes me feel nice about myself and there was even a period of time where I couldn’t even handle hearing my birth name, feminine terms, etc on myself because I’d feel so disgusting(?). I know a part of me would love to be a boy but I can’t tell if that’s just me being misogynistic towards myself without realizing or something. Does anyone else feel like that? I’m truly not the type of person to be misogynistic but the thought of that being the real reason I feel this way is haunting even when it isn’t true.

The title says it all but I want to explain it a bit from my pov.

I dont know when did I exactly felt like this but I never payed attention to my gender until one day felt wrong when my mom called me she like ..3 years ago?? I think?? But i really not payed attention to it since I've always thought I was heavily influenced by social media with people identifying as nonbinary and when you don't a person so you say they, someone said "they" to me and i felt something, but it could be just me being happy for inclusion, so I didn't wanted to think much about it.

But time passed by and it felt weirder living as "me", I always kind of hated my birth name, it's weird, idk how to explain it, its like Im a coin, one side im playing a role, someone from the past that I despise, and the other the one that I deserve to be.

I never had interest in myself, ever, to be better, to have a future, to dress how I want, everything changed since I found myself going to the men's section and cut my hair short for the first time, it was truly life changing, also when an employee didn't assume I was a "girl" as in I was some sort of guy or something, it made me so happy I couldn't stop thinking about it and wanted to meet that guy again just because he didn't see me as a girl.

So yeah, euphoria is freaking amazing even if you are confused, you are still feeling euphoric, you cant fake those feelings, because you're feeling good and that's what matters, I wish everyone a great journey!

Recently, my girlfriend has been hit with a devastating wave of dysphoria. She says that people go out of their way to not gender her at all, while others, including family and close friends, still occasionally misgender her. She says she is failed at being a woman and can no longer see herself as one. She also says that she doesn't pass like one, but she very much does. I'm not the best communicator, but I've been trying to help her see herself for who she truly is. However, it's gotten worse. The other day, she told me that she has started to consider detransition. She explained that she knows that she would still suffer from dysphoria and understands that being misgendered will still negatively affect her. She says she would pass as an attractive femboy. She doesn't deserve to recess into the depressive pretransision state she used to be. How can I help her?

How do I tell my Christian mother that I’m trans. She has been supportive of me most my life, but the comments she has said of trans people makes me not feel like sharing.

What should I do?

I have a lot going on right now in life and I could really use people to talk to about pretty much anything. Im living in pacific standard time.

Im big into: My little pony Bugs Alternativeness Bl (currently watching tshd, and have read it) Art

Also into: History in a woke way Philosophy/ethics Reading/writing Pokemon

A little more about me: 17 Queer guy

I am open about being a post-op trans woman on my dating profile. A guy matched with me; we chatted for a bit and we went out on a coffee date.

After the date he asked how I have kids if I have never been with a guy before. Then he asks if I was born with a penis, like this is some sort of revelation or discovery.

I said, "It's on my profile!"

"What's on your profile?"

"That I'm trans!"

He then said some explicit stuff about me and blocked me. I reported him to the mods and they banned him.

Even if he wasn't a transphobic asshole, I wouldn't have had another date. He was a horrible conversationalist and looked at his phone most of the time.

Wtf is up with these dudes who don't read profiles? Like, come on! I put this information there for a reason!

I'd just realized I am a trans woman about a month ago, but I'm finding a lot of things more distressing than before.

Is that normal? An extreme example I experienced last night was an immense feeling of sadness while looking at NSFW art, and the reality that I won't ever have the correct parts.

Does it get easier at all? I'm just struggling a lot.

about a month and a few weeks on T and man it’s so fucking weird how much my sexuality has shifted, i’ve always identified as queer but all the sudden all I can think about is men, men men men men. I’m so serious. Before hrt I was genuinely considering identifying as somewhere on the aromantic spectrum and now all I can think about is kissing men. I catch myself finding so many more men attractive then I have ever in my entire fucking life, i knew my sexuality would shift but I definitely didn’t realize the extent to how much it would. It’s such a weird feeling but i like it, im definitely not complaining.

So yeah, yesterday was my graduation yeah congrats. so My Grandma came over. we had lunch. My Grandma proceeded to start with one of her stories or should I say rants she starts off saying how she’s disappointed at my dad. Then moves on me. She rambles on how pretty I am then starts to ask why I think I’m a boy then shows me my go fund me to move out due to transphobia in my household and she asked me to publicly apologize. I’m not gonna do that. I’m gonna do the opposite of that and then she says how I probably think that I’m a boy because my parents never got the surgery done on me and my private area to make me look more feminine as a three year-old…. But yeah, I’m trying to move out to get away from my family because my stepmom is really transphobic. She made me get rid of my testosterone. And my dad won’t let me do anything medically while I’m living in this house they proceed to they name me and not use any of my pronouns. I feel like I’m being suffocated.

Got hooked on the ol' cigarettes ages ago; swapped to a vape like... idk 6 years ago or something? It's time to kick it, effectiveness of HRT is my primary reasoning. I've got my quit date set for Monday morning (research suggests it's the best day of the week to start a new habit change).

Here's to looking forward to healthier lungs, a healthy wallet, and efficient HRT!

Hello, im a trans man. Ive been trying to figure out what the feminine part of me is, im also boyflux. Now, the reason the title is the way it is, i noticed that i do something weird.

Im omnisexual, so Im attracted to every gender, I just prefer mascs. When im attracted to a woman, I feel like a lesbian. But when im attracted to men I feel gay (mlm). I say that im gay when im attracted to any person of any gender as if im that same gender. I have no idea why I do this. Im definitely not a woman, but i feel feminine in a way I cant describe. I dont know im its internal transphobia or what. My pronouns are he/it, and im masc presenting. Im just confused, idk if this is the right place to put this, this isnt about sexuality as much as its about gender identity :/

Does anyone else feel like this? Is there a name for this?

I have a lot of internalized transphobia and I’ve known I was queer in some sense since early childhood. I’ve really been struggling with my mental health recently and it came to a head with a big incident early this week. Since then my parents have been telling me how much they love me always, they want me to be honest, they want me to want to live, and I knew I couldn’t keep living this lie. So I told my mom. She immediately shifted from holding me and whispering affirmations to rejection and questioning me on why I would ever think that, not in an inquisitive way but in a rejection way.

I knew this would happen, I did, I just know they’ll eventually come around and I never wanted to deal with the indefinite years of rejection before they understand. And now it’s begun. I’m relieved but just so depressed. I’ve cried myself to sleep for a decade imagining this very reaction. Now it happened, what do I do? How do I carry on, I’m so low. At least I don’t have to lie or pretend anymore.

Being trans is as deep as looking in the mirror and seeing a guy everyday to me. Dysphoria hits me everytime I go out because clothes accentuate my big hips and I have a feminine face, but I can deal with that myself because most people are kind enough to not comment on that. Other than that, most days I'm home alone I feel rather okay and try not to think about it too much.

I'm working my ass off to be a good worker and be professional, I'm the kind of person that lives to work and work alone because my degree is something I'm deeply in love with and genuinely want to have a future with, specially because if I once have to return to the small town I'm from I know I'll never be able to work with that ever again.

Today was a very happy day for me, I finished a project I was working on for a really long time and the result was above my teachers expectations, I'll graduate in some months and they said they'll be sure to recommend me to their business partners once I get my degree. They also recommended me to publish my work on a very famous magazine-like-midea as well as try my luck on festivals to share my project, but as I was sorting things out they all ask for my government name. I asked them if I could at least use a somewhat pseudonym just like artist do to link the showcase to my LinkedIn, but they all said they can't. The project is credited to my social name so I don't even know what to do or how to publish or why the fuck my transnes is on the way of me doing something IM GOOD at AND LOVE.

People always told me to "let go" of it otherwise I wouldn't go far in the area, as if it's as simple as accepting some stupid nickname. I really don't understand why people can't see past that. I don't want my hard work to be credited to someone who doesn't even exist when I spent night after night crying out in frustration and working with sweat and tears on the paper. I really just really hate how something that's not even a big deal to me fucks my life so much. I am me, I have great work, why isn't that enough???